考研英语一2016年大作文写作方向与示例

启航教育在考研英语写作教学中反复强调：词汇与句式的高级化是考研英语作文高分的关键。本文整理的2016年考研英语一批改范例，几乎每一段都包含高分替换词与衔接词，是考研英语一大作文写作锦囊中的代表性范文。

一、考研英语一2016年大作文题目

考研英语一2016年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following pictures. In your essay, you should1) describe the pictures briefly, 2) interpret the meaning, and3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2016年大作文批改例文

On the lift-hand cartoon, there is a father watching TV and requiring his son to study. In contrast, On the right-hand portrayal, father and his son devote themselves in diligent study together. Evidently the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that show their children how to do by their own practice is the brush that paints bright future, while simply relying on request their children what to do is the shackle that hinder progress.

This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, neglecting to be a module to their children is like a heavy chain that hinders children’s progress, leaving them with a negative outlook on life, depriving them of the motivation to study and preventing them from shining brightly in future society. On the other hand, show children how to do by parent’s practice can ignite children’s zeal to study-hard, thus making children’s childhood rewarding and meaningful rather them being self-consuming.

In brief, doing with children rather than ordering children what to do is the catalyst for teenagers’ development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice, only by doing so, can we develop children’s potential and fulfill their aspirations.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：lift

批改：left

原文：show

批改：动名词做主语，改成showing

原文：request

批改：on是介词，改成requesting

原文：hinder

批改：单三hinders

原文：On the lift-hand cartoon, there is a father watching TV and requiring his son to study. In contrast, On the right-hand portrayal, father and his son devote themselves in diligent study together. Evidently the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that show their children how to do by their own practice is the brush that paints bright future, while simply relying on request their children what to do is the shackle that hinder progress.

批改：能够完整全面的描述出图画中的现象，并能够直接点明作文的主题。

原文：module

批改：model

原文：show

批改：showing

原文：-

批改：不用加连字符

原文：them

批改：than

原文：This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, neglecting to be a module to their children is like a heavy chain that hinders children’s progress, leaving them with a negative outlook on life, depriving them of the motivation to study and preventing them from shining brightly in future society. On the other hand, show children how to do by parent’s practice can ignite children’s zeal to study-hard, thus making children’s childhood rewarding and meaningful rather them being self-consuming.

批改：能够通过正反两方面进行论述来突出论点，能够运用逻辑关系词，使得句子之间衔接较为连贯。

原文：,

批改：句号断句

原文：only

批改：首字母大写

原文：In brief, doing with children rather than ordering children what to do is the catalyst for teenagers’ development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice, only by doing so, can we develop children’s potential and fulfill their aspirations.

批改：能够提出自己的建议，起到了总结和再次呼应主题的作用。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：15/20

内容切题，全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面，注意避免拼写错误；句式方面，句子结构完整连贯，注意正确使用标点断句；语法方面，注意动名词做主语以及介词后加动词ing形式。逻辑结构清晰完整，论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子，结构清晰。

修改建议：可以看出作文完成的很认真，无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰，值得表扬。如果能够再注意避免以上的一些小的细节问题会更好。继续加油。

对每一位2027考研人而言，考研英语一大作文都是冲刺阶段必须攻克的难关。启航教育陪伴一届又一届学子走向考研英语写作高分，本文精解的2016年考研英语一范文正是经典参考之一。欢迎关注启航教育，了解更多考研英语备考干货。