启航教育考研英语教研组精心筛选了2016年考研英语二大作文真题原文及高分批改范例。本篇范文中,老师对每一句都给出修改建议,是考研英语二作文模板备考资料库中的精品,特别推荐给参加2027考研的学子。
一、考研英语二2016年大作文题目
考研英语二2016年大作文Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and2) give your comments.You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET.
二、考研英语二2016年大作文批改例文
The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of certain high school students’ traveling purpose. Enjoying views takes the lead at 37%, followed by releasing pressure at 33%. Additionally, factors such as making friends, cultivating independent ability, and other purpose are also considered, accounting for 9%, 6%, and 15%, respectively.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the old saying goes, ‘‘on life’s stage, pressures are always present.’’ Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense academic pressure, and as a result, traveling outside become has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. In addition, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, students are no longer contend with mere material satisfaction; they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why an increasing number of students choose traveling outside to enjoy views. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trend? I am confident that the above statistic figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of students, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:traveling purpo
批改:students’ traveling purpose 中,purpose 应用复数 purposes。
原文:pose
批改:other purpose 应为复数 other purposes
原文: pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of certain high school students’ traveling purpose. Enjoying views takes the lead at 37%, followed by releasing pressure at 33%. Additionally, factors such as making friends, cultivating independent ability, and other purpose are also considered, accounting for 9%, 6%, and 15%, respectively.
批改:一个非常扎实的开头段!信息完整,组织有序
原文:e become has emer
批改:traveling outside become has emerged 存在严重的语法结构混乱,应为 traveling has become 或 traveling has emerged。
原文:ontend
批改:students are no longer contend 中,contend 是动词原形,此处应为形容词 content(满意的)。
原文: core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the old saying goes, ‘‘on life’s stage, pressures are always present.’’ Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense academic pressure, and as a result, traveling outside become has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. In addition, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, students are no longer contend with mere material satisfaction; they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why an increasing number of students choose traveling outside to enjoy views. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:本段的论证逻辑非常出色!你恰当地引用了名言来解释“缓解压力”,并将“欣赏风景”与“精神享受”联系起来,两个原因都紧扣主题,分析到位。
原文:ure trend
批改:future trend 应为复数 future trends,因为讨论的是多种趋势构成的未来图景。
原文:at about future trend? I am confident that the above statistic figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of students, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
批改:一个很有深度的结尾段!预测合理,表达也展现了思想性
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:11分
优点:结构完美,内容要点覆盖全面,论证逻辑深刻、贴切,结尾有力。
扣分点:全文存在少量(但确实存在)的语法和用词错误,
总评与终极建议:
检查:在考场上写完作文后,请务必留出2-3分钟,只做一件事:专项检查名词单复数和动词形式。这能帮你瞬间抓住本文中“purpose/purposes", "become/has become", "contend/content"这类错误。
在保证准确的前提下,可以尝试一些替换。例如,将“releasing pressure”替换为“relieving stress”,将“enjoying views”替换为“appreciating scenery”。
考研英语二作文模板写作提分高效的方式,是让经验丰富的老师亲自批改你的作文。启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班,主讲斌哥亲批每一份学员作业,真题作业批改、轻松应对各种复杂题目,让考研英语写作更有底。
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