考研英语一2011年大作文写作方向与示例

作为考研英语备考的核心模块，2011年考研英语一大作文承载了大量学生的提分期待。本文带来的这篇批改例文，紧扣考研英语一作文模板常见话题，由启航教育资深英语教研团队逐句批改，详细标注语法、词汇与逻辑三大失分点，是考研英语写作提分的优质资料。

一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目

考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文

As shown in the picture, there are tourists sitting in the boat and throwing rubbish into the river. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environmental pollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal lives and society.

This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, in modern society full of chances and changes, civilized quality has become a key factor that distinguishes exceptional individuals from ordinary people and its significance has become increasingly evident. What is more, environment protection holds exceptional significance for a nation, as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for shaping national moral further propelling social stability and sustainable development.

How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal including strengthening self-discipline and enhancing supervision, with the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：moral

批改：moral 主要做形容词，这里建议改为 morality

原文：, w

批改：句号 大写

原文：both in our personal lives and society.

批改：both...and...结构连接的两个部分应保持语法平行，改为 both in our personal lives and in society.

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：17 /20

从结构层面看，文章遵循了经典的“描述现象-分析问题-提出解决方案”的论述结构，层次分明

从内容层面看，第二段将问题提升到“个人文明素质”和“国家可持续发展基石”的高度，体现了思维的深度。

从语言层面看，词汇运用出色，使用了大量准确且地道的词汇和短语。

建议：最后一段存在一个“逗号粘连”错误。逗号连接了两个完整的句子。语法细节上平行结构要求 both... and...连接的两个部分在语法上完全对称。加油！

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