考研英语一2017年大作文失分点批改

2017年考研英语一大作文是启航考研英语备考清单中的必练题型。本文带来的高分批改范例，配套启航教育老师的逐句批注与预测话题标签，适合考研英语考生在冲刺阶段精读精练，是一套完整的写作提升资料。

一、考研英语一2017年大作文题目

考研英语一2017年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following pictures. In your essay, you should1) describe the pictures briefly, 2) interpret the meaning, and 3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2017年大作文批改例文

What is self-evident is that in the former picture, a boy who has a plenty of books but seldom read, in the later one, a boy as hard-working as smart says that he will try to read 20 books in a year. From my perspective, the picture does reflect a thought-provoking social phenomenon: the importance of reading regularly deserves our due attention by private individuals.

When subjected to analysis but a close inspection of the idea would reveal that reading regularly really has its fundamental reasons. First and foremost, it is truth widely acknowledged that all other factors being equal, reading books regularly could be the decisive difference between broadening your horizons success and not.In addition, since young people always play a vanguard role in promoting social progress, and reading books regularly exerts remarkable influence on the development of their characters, it will inevitably shape every aspect of China in the foreseeable future.Consequently, the lack of reading regularly will hinder us from making substantial progress and eventually cost us dearly.

Overall, reading habit is as significant as water to fish and relevant measures must be taken promptly.To be specific, governments should implement proper policies and launch mass media campaign to appeal, education institutions should provide open courses and guidance to infuse such an indispensable awareness into everyone. The more rapidly concrete efforts are made, the more effectively this awareness will benefit us in the upcoming future.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文： is self-evident is that in the former picture, a boy who has a plenty of books but seldom read, in the later one, a boy as hard-working as smart says that he will try to read 20 books in a year. From my perspective, the picture does reflect a thought-provoking social phenomenon: the importance of reading regularly deserves our due attention by private individuals.

批改：本段基本完成了对图画的描述，并引出了文章主题。但图画描述部分的句子结构不完整，逻辑衔接生硬。“private individuals”在此处使用不当。

原文：at is self-evident is that in the former picture, a boy who has a ple

批改：首句“What is self-evident is that... a boy who has... but seldom read, in the later one...”是一个不完整的句子，缺少核心谓语，结构混乱。

原文： a plenty of books

批改：a plenty of books → 应改为 plenty of books 或 a lot of books

原文：seldom read,

批改：seldom read → read 时态错误，应改为 seldom reads（主语是第三人称单数）。

原文：in the later one

批改：in the later one → 比较两者中后者，应使用 in the latter

原文：When subjected to analysis but a close inspection of the idea would reveal that reading regularly really has its fundamental reasons. First and foremost, it is truth widely acknowledged that all other factors being equal, reading books regularly could be the decisive difference between broadening your horizons success and not.In addition, since young people always play a vanguard role in promoting social progress, and reading books regularly exerts remarkable influence on the development of their characters, it will inevitably shape every aspect of China in the foreseeable future.Consequently, the lack of reading regularly will hinder us from making substantial progress and eventually cost us dearly.

批改：本段试图论证阅读的重要性，论证充分

原文：When subjected to analysis but a close inspection of the idea would reveal that reading regularly really has its fundamental reasons

批改：首句“When subjected to analysis but a close inspection...” 结构杂糅且错误，导致句子无法理解。可简化为“A close analysis reveals that...”。

原文：between broadening your horizons success and not.In addition

批改：between broadening your horizons success and not” 语法和表意完全错误。“success”不能与“broadening your horizons”这样并列。

原文： the lack of reading regularly

批改：the lack of reading regularly → 应改为 the lack of regular reading

原文：Overall, reading habit is as significant as water to fish and relevant measures must be taken promptly.To be specific, governments should implement proper policies and launch mass media campaign to appeal, education institutions should provide open courses and guidance to infuse such an indispensable awareness into everyone. The more rapidly concrete efforts are made, the more effectively this awareness will benefit us in the upcoming future.

批改：本段提出了建议，内容基本合理

原文：reading habit

批改：reading habit → 最好使用复数形式 reading habits，或改为 the habit of reading

原文： mass media campaign

批改：mass media campaign → 应改为 mass media campaigns

原文：o appeal

批改：to appeal → 在这里意义不完整，是“呼吁”什么？表意不清

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：11分

题目要求：文章切题，结构完整，包含了描述、阐释与评论三个部分。

语言表达：

语法方面：存在多处影响理解的严重语法错误，如第一段的不完整句和若干基础语法错误（主谓一致、冠词、介词等）。

词汇方面：词汇量尚可，但存在一些使用不当的情况

句式方面：尝试使用复杂句式，但掌控能力不足，导致句子结构混乱；部分句子冗长，表意不清。

结构与完整性：结构清晰，内容完整。

修改建议：先求准确，再求华丽。

彻底解决句子完整性问题：确保写的每一个句子都有完整的主谓结构。在尝试长句之前，先练习把几个意思用正确的短句清楚地表达出来。

精炼用词，不确定的表达宁可不用，改用确信正确的词。写完後自己通读一遍。

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