据启航教育英语教研组统计,考研英语作文批改话题连续多年成为考研英语一大作文的高频考点。本文带来的2017年考研英语一批改例文中,考生通过对社会热点的精准分析与地道表达,获得高分,其写作思路可供2027考研英语一考生直接借鉴。
一、考研英语一2017年大作文题目
考研英语一2017年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following pictures. In your essay, you should1) describe the pictures briefly, 2) interpret the meaning, and 3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2017年大作文批改例文
In the left-hand, there is a person sitting on the chair and boasting that he has many books. On the contrary, in the right-hand portrayal, there is also a person sitting on the sofa and making an effort to full 20 books. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that paying attention to fact is the brush that paints a bright future, while boasting is the shackle that hinder progress
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, paying attention to fact can ignite our creativity and promote personal growth and self-fulfillment, thus making life rewarding and meaningful, rather than being self-consuming. On the other hand, boasting is likely a heavy chain that hinders children’s progress, leaving them with a negative outlook on life,and preventing them from shining brightly in future society.
In brief, concentrating on fact is the catalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this quality, additionally, we must be acutely aware of the detrimental effects of boasting to ensure our growth stays on course.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:the left-hand, there is a person sitting on the chair and boasting that he has many books. On the contrary, in the right-hand portrayal, there is also a person sitting on the sofa and making an effort to full 20 books. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that paying attention to fact is the brush that paints a bright future, while boasting is the shackle that hinder progress
批改: 你对两幅图画的对比描述非常到位,直接点明了核心差异。结尾的总结句是全文的亮点,比喻贴切且有力。
原文: full 20 bo
批改:“full” 是形容词/名词,这里需要动词,应改为 “finish reading 20 books”
原文:ckle that hinder pro
批改:the shackle that hinder progress” 存在主谓不一致,单数主语 “shackle” 应搭配 “hinders”。
原文:s phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, paying attention to fact can ignite our creativity and promote personal growth and self-fulfillment, thus making life rewarding and meaningful, rather than being self-consuming. On the other hand, boasting is likely a heavy chain that hinders children’s progress, leaving them with a negative outlook on life,and preventing them from shining brightly in future society.
批改: 本段从正反两方面展开论证,结构清晰。“heavy chain”的比喻非常形象,后续的论述也很有力。
原文:rief, concentrating on fact is the catalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this quality, additionally, we must be acutely aware of the detrimental effects of boasting to ensure our growth stays on course.
批改:结尾段总结有力,“catalyst”(催化剂)一词的使用非常精准。提出的建议也很好地收束了全文
原文:his quali
批改:“this quality” 指代有点模糊,前文讨论的是一种行为或态度,而非一种“品质”,建议改为 “this practice” 或 “this mindset”。“additionally,” 前面的逗号连接了两个完整的句子,这是“逗号粘连”错误。可以在此处使用分号,即 “...this practice; additionally, we must...”。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:16
你的文章具备了清晰的结构、准确的立意和出彩的亮点句,这为你冲击高分奠定了坚实的基础。主要的提升空间在于确保核心概念在全文中的一致性,以及提升语法和衔接的严谨性。
修改建议
保持论述焦点统一:在总结时,确保核心词(如“注重事实”)与前文详细论证的对象(如图画中的“行动”)完美呼应,这样文章的整体感会更强。
处理好句子衔接:注意“逗号粘连”问题,在连接两个完整句子时,使用分号或连接词(如and, but, so),这样能让你的文章在语法层面也无懈可击。
复习考研英语大作文,务必要重视范文精读+专业批改的双向结合。启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班,专为冲刺阶段考生打造,从话题预测到写作模板一应俱全,是考研英语作文批改写作提分的可靠方案。
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