启航教育考研英语教研组精心筛选了2023年考研英语二大作文真题原文及高分批改范例。本篇范文中,老师对每一句都给出修改建议,是考研英语二作文真题备考资料库中的精品,特别推荐给参加2027考研的学子。
一、2023年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2023年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe and interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. Write your answer in about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2023年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The line chart clearly depicts the levels of the health literacy among residents in China from 2012 to 2021. In 2012, the percentage of the health literaly was 8.80%, but by 2016, this rate had gradually risen to 11.58%. In contrast, the proportion of the health literaly experienced a significant increase of about 13.8% from 2016 to 2021.
The corn reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of the changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound infrastructure, promoting residents" health literacy. What is more, as we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends? I am confident that the proportion of the levels of the health literaly among Chinese residents is a clear sign of social improvement and will steadily increase in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:The line chart clearly depicts the levels of the health literacy among residents in China from 2012 to 2021. In 2012, the percentage of the health literaly was 8.80%, but by 2016, this rate had gradually risen to 11.58%. In contrast, the proportion of the health literaly experienced a significant increase of about 13.8% from 2016 to 2021.
批改:首段准确概括了图表内容,注意区分不同图表类型(条形图/折线图/饼状图)及如何描述,多积累表变化的动词如increase/rise/drop,以及表程度的副词如dramatically/significantly/steadily,还有描述最大最小值的短语如account for the largest proportion
原文:literaly
批改:正确写法为 literacy
原文:literaly
批改:正确写法为 literacy
原文:corn
批改:正确写法为 core
原文:build a sound infrastructure
批改:完善医疗基建可以说 improve medical facilities
原文:significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices
批改:也可以说 which significantly directs people"s choices towards medical health
原文:The corn reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of the changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound infrastructure, promoting residents" health literacy. What is more, as we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:主干分析了图中现象产生的原因,一方面从医疗基础设施建设的角度说明,建议可以结合时事热点举出具体的例子如AI智能挂号、远程会诊、家庭医生签约服务等体现医疗卫生方面的显著变化,接着从疫情这一具体事例说明人们健康意识有所增加,对医疗卫生的投入和支出增加,总体论述角度是很好的,条理也较清晰
原文:levels
批改:改为 level
原文:levels
批改:改为 level
原文:literaly
批改:正确写法为 literacy
原文:What about future trends? I am confident that the proportion of the levels of the health literaly among Chinese residents is a clear sign of social improvement and will steadily increase in the following decades.
批改:结尾进行了预测,未来居民健康素养水平将继续上升
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:10/15
1)内容上:图表描述的较准确,分析原因时给出具体例证会更好;
2)语言上:运用了非谓语添彩,用词和表达可以更灵活;
3)结构上:运用了逻辑连词,文章条理较清晰;
4)学习建议:
主干分别从国家、社会和个人等角度展开,主体明确,也可以参考如下逻辑逐层展开,“教育体系的完善使得大众的平均受教育水平提高——人均健康意识增加——人们更愿意主动了解和掌握关于健康的知识——全民健身氛围浓厚,人们总体健康素养水平也相继提高”;文中在论述时可以给出具体的数据或例子支撑会更有说服力;语言上可以有意识运用多样的表达,尝试转述或同义替换的方法,先保证准确传达句意,再灵活运用优质的短语和句型句式丰富表达。
考研英语二作文真题写作提分高效的方式,是让经验丰富的老师亲自批改你的作文。启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班,主讲斌哥亲批每一份学员作业,真题作业批改、轻松应对各种复杂题目,让考研英语写作更有底。
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