考研英语一2011年大作文失分点批改

2011年考研英语一大作文是启航考研英语备考清单中的必练题型。本文带来的高分批改范例，配套启航教育老师的逐句批注与预测话题标签，适合考研英语考生在冲刺阶段精读精练，是一套完整的写作提升资料。

一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目

考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文

Charles Dickens once said that it was the best of times and it was the worst of times. This idea applies perfectly to the picture: there are two tourists, sitting on a boat, enjoying the scenery and throwing garbage into the water, which pollutes the river. Through this vivid illustration, a crucial message emerges that we should attach importance to environmental pollution.

Admittedly, numerous factors can be taken into account but the following two reasons are of the utmost significance. For one thing, traveling has emerged as a prevalent means for individuals to alleviate stress and rejuvenate themselves. Long gone are the days when tourism was regarded as a luxury expenditure. Nowadays, people, especially youngsters, tend to go traveling during their leisure time. For another, the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon.Travelersmay disregarded the importance of protecting the environment.

How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? Firstly, what"s good for the environment is also good for people. We need to foster the vision that lucid waters and lush mountains are invaluable assets. Secondly, the government should assume responsibilities to make policies to protect the environment. Last but not least, everyone should insist protecting the environment for a better future.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：Charles Dickens once said that it was the best of times and it was the worst of times.

批改：

原文：Charles Dickens once said that it was the best of times and it was the worst of times. This idea applies perfectly to the picture: there are two tourists, sitting on a boat, enjoying the scenery and throwing garbage into the water, which pollutes the river. Through this vivid illustration, a crucial message emerges that we should attach importance to environmental pollution.

批改：能够完整全面的描述出图画中的现象，并能够直接点明作文的主题。

原文：disregarded

批改：may情态动词后加动词原形，改成disregard

原文：Admittedly, numerous factors can be taken into account but the following two reasons are of the utmost significance. For one thing, traveling has emerged as a prevalent means for individuals to alleviate stress and rejuvenate themselves. Long gone are the days when tourism was regarded as a luxury expenditure. Nowadays, people, especially youngsters, tend to go traveling during their leisure time. For another, the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon.Travelersmay disregarded the importance of protecting the environment.

批改：该段落能够将图画背后蕴含的真实意义加以阐述，语言衔接连贯。能够运用逻辑关系词来连接句子，值得表扬。

原文：lucid waters and lush mountains are invaluable assets.

批改：

批改：加in，insist in doing sth坚持做某事

原文：How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? Firstly, what"s good for the environment is also good for people. We need to foster the vision that lucid waters and lush mountains are invaluable assets. Secondly, the government should assume responsibilities to make policies to protect the environment. Last but not least, everyone should insist protecting the environment for a better future.

批改：能够提出自己的建议，起到了总结和再次呼应主题的作用。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：17/20

内容切题，准确全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面，无拼写错误；句式方面，句子结构完整连贯；语法方面，注意时态动词后加动词原形。逻辑结构清晰完整，论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子，结构清晰。

修改建议：可以看出作文完成的非常认真，无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰，还能够恰当引用名言，值得表扬。继续加油。

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