考研英语作文失分点多、提分空间大,一直是2011年考研英语一备考生核心痛点之一。本文围绕考研英语一作文真题话题,给出一篇经过启航教育老师精细批改的高分范文,文中不仅有逐句批注,还附有可复制的考研英语一高分写作模板。
一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目
考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文
As shown in the cartoon, there are two visitors, sitting on the boat and throwing litter into river, which make the river full of garbage. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environmental pollution is an issue that requires our great attention both in our personal lives and in society.
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. frist and foremost, behaviors that harm the environment can damage personal image and reputation, leading to exclusion and failure in work and social situation. What is more, protecting the environment holds exceptional significantce for nation, as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for shaping national morals, further propelling social stability and sustainable development.
How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including strengthening the guilding vole of the media in public opinion and instilling the idea of preserving the environment into students. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to strengthen self-discipline. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:make
批改:makes单三
原文:s shown in the cartoon, there are two visitors, sitting on the boat and throwing litter into river, which make the river full of garbage. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environmental pollution is an issue that requires our great attention both in our personal lives and in society.
批改:能够完整全面的描述出图画中的现象,并能够直接点明作文的主题。
原文:This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. frist and foremost, behaviors that harm the environment can damage personal image and reputation, leading to exclusion and failure in work and social situation. What is more, protecting the environment holds exceptional significantce for nation, as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for shaping national morals, further propelling social stability and sustainable development.
批改:能够通过正反两方面进行论述来突出论点,能够运用逻辑关系词,使得句子之间衔接较为连贯。
原文:vole
批改:role
原文:How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including strengthening the guilding vole of the media in public opinion and instilling the idea of preserving the environment into students. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to strengthen self-discipline. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.
批改:能够提出自己的建议,起到了总结和再次呼应主题的作用。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:18/20
内容切题,准确全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面,注意避免拼写错误;句式方面,句子结构完整连贯;语法方面,注意主谓一致问题。逻辑结构清晰完整,论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子,结构清晰。
修改建议:可以看出作文完成的非常认真,无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰,值得表扬。如果能够再注意避免以上的一些小的细节性错误会更好。继续加油。
如果你也想让自己的考研英语一作文拿到理想分数,可以将本文的范文与老师批注作为标杆反复研读。同时,启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班已正式启动报名,在线咨询可获考研英语一作文真题高分资料礼包。
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