作为考研英语备考的核心模块,2010年考研英语一大作文承载了大量学生的提分期待。本文带来的这篇批改例文,紧扣考研英语一写作技巧常见话题,由启航教育资深英语教研团队逐句批改,详细标注语法、词汇与逻辑三大失分点,是考研英语写作提分的优质资料。
一、考研英语一2010年大作文题目
考研英语一2010年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and 3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2010年大作文批改例文
As shown in the cartoon,there is a hot pot,filled with many cultures, for example Kung Fu,Confucius and so on.Evidently,the cartoonist intends to convey that it is cultural exchange that plays an important and positive role both in our personal lives and in society.
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways,but two of them are particularly significant.On the one hand,cultural exchange holds exceptional significance for a nation, as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for boosting overall national strength and shaping national morals, further propelling social stability and sustainable development.On the other hand,neglecting cultural exchange is like a heavy chain that hinders our nation"s progress,not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth, but also significantly affecting its international competitiveness.
In brief, cultural exchange is the catalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice. Only by doing so can we make our world
shine with renewed brilliance.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:for example
批改:such as后加名词
原文:Kung Fu
批改:首字母小写
原文:Confucius
批改:儒家是Confucianism
原文:As shown in the cartoon,there is a hot pot,filled with many cultures, for example Kung Fu,Confucius and so on.Evidently,the cartoonist intends to convey that it is cultural exchange that plays an important and positive role both in our personal lives and in society.
批改:能够完整全面的描述出图画中的现象,并能够直接点明作文的主题。
原文:This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways,but two of them are particularly significant.On the one hand,cultural exchange holds exceptional significance for a nation, as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for boosting overall national strength and shaping national morals, further propelling social stability and sustainable development.On the other hand,neglecting cultural exchange is like a heavy chain that hinders our nation"s progress,not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth, but also significantly affecting its international competitiveness.
批改:能够通过正反两方面进行论述来突出论点,能够运用逻辑关系词,使得句子之间衔接较为连贯。
原文:brief, cultural exchange is the catalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice. Only by doing so can we make our world shine with renewed brilliance.
批改:能够提出自己的建议,起到了总结和再次呼应主题的作用。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:17/20
内容切题,准确全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面,注意专有名词的正确表达;句式方面,句子结构完整连贯;语法方面,such as后加名词或短语,for example后加句子。逻辑结构清晰完整,论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子,结构清晰。
修改建议:可以看出作文完成的非常认真,无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰,值得表扬。如果能够再注意避免以上的一些小的细节性错误会更好。继续加油。
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