当你坐在考研英语一考场,面对2011年大作文题目的那一瞬间,是否能快速组织起一篇结构清晰、表达地道的高分文章?本文这篇批改例文,正是考研英语一写作技巧话题下的标准范本,适合每一位考研英语备考生反复研读。
一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目
考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文
As shown in the cartoon, there are two people, sitting on the boat and enjoying their journey, with plenty of rubbishes floating over the lake. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environment pollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal lives and in society.
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, behaviors that pollute the environment can harm relationships, erode trust and respect, and cause the loss of opportunities and resources. It can also damage personal image and reputation, leading to exclusion and failure in work and social situations. What is more, environment pollution is like a heavy chain that hinders our nation"s progress, not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth, but also significantly affecting its international image.
How can we put an end to the problem of environment pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including enhancing supervision and strengthening moral education. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to strengthen self-discipline.With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:rubbishes
批改:rubbish是不可数名词,无复数形式
原文:environment
批改:建议改为environmental
原文:As shown in the cartoon, there are two people, sitting on the boat and enjoying their journey, with plenty of rubbishes floating over the lake. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environment pollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal lives and in society.
批改:开头信息清晰明了
原文:environment
批改:environmental
原文:environment
批改:建议改为environmental
原文:This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, behaviors that pollute the environment can harm relationships, erode trust and respect, and cause the loss of opportunities and resources. It can also damage personal image and reputation, leading to exclusion and failure in work and social situations. What is more, environment pollution is like a heavy chain that hinders our nation"s progress, not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth, but also significantly affecting its international image.
批改:词汇和句型丰富
原文:How can we put an end to the problem of environment pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including enhancing supervision and strengthening moral education. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to strengthen self-discipline.With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.
批改:good
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:18/20.
1.作文内容包含全面,主题明确,层次分明;
2.运用复杂的语法结构和高级词汇,定语从句,非谓语动词和强调句型很棒;
3.采用恰当的衔接手法,内容较为连贯;
4.要多内化老师讲的高分词汇和模板句型,形成自己的语料库和写作思路,哪怕题目再变,也能自如应对,加油!
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