正在备考考研英语的你,是否还在为2011年考研英语一大作文的写法犯愁?本文精选一篇高分组同学的批改例文,系统梳理考研英语作文话题的常考话题与写作框架。透过启航教育老师的逐段点评,你能直观感受高分作文的得分诀窍。
一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目
考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文
As shown in the cartoon, there is a two people sitting on the beat and enjoying the scenery, while they throwing rubbish into the river, Evidently the cartoonist intends to convery to readers that the environmental damage is an issue that requires great attention both in our persoual lives and in society
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several way. but two of them are particularly significant. In one hand, environmental protection holds exceptional significance for a nation, as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for boosting overall national strength and shaping national morals, futher propelling social stability and sustainable development. On the other hand, environmental damage is like a heavy chain that hinders our nation"s progress, not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth, but also significantly affecting its international image.
How can we put an end to the problem of environmental damage? It"s suggested by many that we need a package deal, including strengthening moral education and issuing related laws. But would these measures are comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to strengthen self-discipline. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文: is a
批改:people是合成名词是复数,改成are
原文:beat
批改:boat
原文:they
批改:去掉,或者在they后加are
原文:,
批改:句号
原文:persoual
批改:personal
原文: shown in the cartoon, there is a two people sitting on the beat and enjoying the scenery, while they throwing rubbish into the river, Evidently the cartoonist intends to convery to readers that the environmental damage is an issue that requires great attention both in our persoual lives and in society
批改:能够完整描述出图画中的内容,语言连贯,注意避免小的语言错误。
原文:way
批改:ways复数
批改:逗号
原文:In one hand,
批改:on the one hand
原文:futher
批改:further
原文:This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several way. but two of them are particularly significant. In one hand, environmental protection holds exceptional significance for a nation, as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for boosting overall national strength and shaping national morals, futher propelling social stability and sustainable development. On the other hand, environmental damage is like a heavy chain that hinders our nation"s progress, not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth, but also significantly affecting its international image.
批改:该段落能够将图画背后蕴含的真实意义加以阐述,语言衔接连贯。能够运用逻辑关系词来连接句子,值得表扬。
原文:are
批改:be
原文:ow can we put an end to the problem of environmental damage? It"s suggested by many that we need a package deal, including strengthening moral education and issuing related laws. But would these measures are comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to strengthen self-discipline. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.
批改:该段再次总结强调写作的中心,起到了点题的作用。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:14/20
内容切题,准确全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面,注意避免拼写错误,名词单复数要使用正确,固定短语要记牢;句式方面,句子结构完整连贯,但是要注意正确使用标点断句。逻辑结构清晰完整,论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子,结构清晰。
修改建议:可以看出作文完成的很认真,无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰,值得表扬。如果能够再注意避免以上的一些小的细节性错误会更好。继续加油。
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