考研英语二2016年大作文实例分析与批改

备战2016年考研英语大作文，先从研读经典高分范文开始。本文汇集的启航教育批改范文中，不仅有原文、批注，还有词汇注释与亮点解析。准备2027考研的同学，可联系启航教育在线咨询考研英语二写作高分规划。

一、考研英语二2016年大作文题目

考研英语二2016年大作文Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and2) give your comments.You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET.

二、考研英语二2016年大作文批改例文

There is a pie chart, which clearly illustrates the significantly differences in purpose of students" travelling in a certain universiy. Enjoying landscapes is the first accounting for 37%, followed by receiving pressure with 33%. Then making frends and developing independence with 9% and 6% respectively.

Such statistics, apparently, can be associated with the tremendous popularity of travelling among college Students. For one thing, youngsters at college are characterized by their strong curiosity for the mysterious nature, which enables them to choose travelling as a way of exploring and enjoying the natural beauties. For another, compared with others, college students tend to suffer more pressure which come from academic pursuit and life. Thus,

some of them relax by sightseeing.Furthermore, travelling can bring us opportunities to know more people, inspire our passion for life, and help us foster the ability to live by ourselves.

As a senior who is preparing for the national entrance examination for postgraduate studies,I am exceedingly busy now because I devote nearly all my time to learning. Thus, I intend to visit the Great Wall, the Forbbiden City, and the Summer Palace after the test. I am convinced that it is visiting these sites that enables me to accumulate adequate historical and cultural knowledge. This is the purpose of my travelling.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：gnificantly difference

批改："significantly differences" → "significant differences"（应用形容词形式）

原文： universiy.

批改："universiy" → "university",

原文： frends

批改：frends" → "friends"

原文：eceiving pressur

批改：receiving pressure" → "relieving stress"

原文： Then making frends and developing independence with 9% and 6% respectively.

批改："Then making frends..." 缺少谓语动词

原文：Studen

批改：Students" → "students"

原文： pressure which co

批改："pressure which come" → "pressure which comes"（主谓不一致）

原文：Forbbiden Cit

批改："Forbbiden" → "Forbidden"

原文：ere is a pie chart, which clearly illustrates the significantly differences in purpose of students" travelling in a certain universiy. Enjoying landscapes is the first accounting for 37%, followed by receiving pressure with 33%. Then making frends and developing independence with 9% and 6% respectivel

批改：本段基本完成了图表描述任务，指出了主要数据。但存在多处语言准确性错误，特别是"receiving pressure"严重曲解原意。需要注意基础词汇的准确使用和句子结构的完整性。

原文：Such statistics, apparently, can be associated with the tremendous popularity of travelling among college Students. For one thing, youngsters at college are characterized by their strong curiosity for the mysterious nature, which enables them to choose travelling as a way of exploring and enjoying the natural beauties. For another, compared with others, college students tend to suffer more pressure which come from academic pursuit and life. Thus, some of them relax by sightseeing.Furthermore, travelling can bring us opportunities to know more people, inspire our passion for life, and help us foster the ability to live by ourselves

批改：本段从三个角度分析原因，思路正确且与图表数据相关联。语言表达相对流畅，但存在一些语法错误。分析可以更加深入，比如具体说明为什么欣赏风景能排第一，而培养独立能力占比最低

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：10分

这篇作文展现了你在组织结构方面的能力，但在几个关键环节还需要加强。

主要优点：

文章结构清晰，分段合理

第二段的原因分析角度恰当

能够使用一些复杂的句式结构

待改进方面：

语言准确性：需要注意基础词汇的拼写和用法，特别是避免"receiving pressure"这样严重的用词错误。

论述深度：分析可以更深入，比如解释各目的之间占比差异的原因。

严重偏题：第三段完全偏离了图表作文的要求，这是最需要改进的问题。

学习建议：

牢记图表作文的基本要求：描述-分析-评论/预测

写作时始终紧扣图表内容

完成后仔细检查基础词汇的准确性

启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班限时招生中，课程包含36句锦囊妙句、6个写作模板、主讲亲批、AI智能批改、配套图书与社群伴学。限时咨询可获考研英语二作文模板写作锦囊纸质书，欢迎在线咨询了解更多详情。