考研英语二2011年大作文写作方向与示例

2011年考研英语二大作文的评分标准严格，对图表描述、主题提炼与观点阐述三大能力均有考查。本文精选的这篇高分批改范例，全程贯彻考研英语二作文模板写作锦囊的核心要点，可作为考研英语写作的标杆范文。

一、考研英语二2011年大作文题目

考研英语二2011年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart and 2) give your comments. You should write at least 150 words. Write your essay on ANSWER SHEET 2. (15 points)

二、考研英语二2011年大作文批改例文

The bar chart clearly depicts the change in market share of some brands in the domestic car market from 2008 to 2009. In 2008, the percentage of domestic brands was 25%, but by 2009, this rate had gradually risen to about 33%. In contrast, the proportion of Japanese brands experienced decline about 10% during the same period, while that of American brands remained stable.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, In recent years, with the decrease in prices and the improvement in quality, domestic car brands have gained growing popularity. An increasing number of people are attracted by the cost-effectiveness and exquisite appearance of domestic cars. In addition, as China"s national strength continues to grow, people have shown greater confidence in domestic brands, so they tend to prefer them when choosing a car. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about the future trends? I am convinced that the market share of domestic car brands is likely to keep expanding in the next few years. Therefore, automakers need to seize the opportunity to produce better car products and continuously expand the market

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：The bar chart clearly depicts the change in market share of some brands in the domestic car market from 2008 to 2009.

批改：概括图表内容可以参考如下 “The bar chart clearly depicts the change of the market shares among Chinese, Japanese and American automobile brands from 2008 to 2009.”

原文：In 2008, the percentage of domestic brands was 25%, but by 2009, this rate had gradually risen to about 33%.

批改：这句话可以这样表达 "The proportion of domestic brand rose from 25% to 33% during 2008 to 2009. At the same time, the percentage of American brand remained at 12%.“更恰当

原文：about

批改：多积累替换词汇，可以说nearly

原文：while

批改：用了while连接前后句子是亮点，将日系品牌和美系品牌的变化作对比，体现了上下文的逻辑关系

原文：The bar chart clearly depicts the change in market share of some brands in the domestic car market from 2008 to 2009. In 2008, the percentage of domestic brands was 25%, but by 2009, this rate had gradually risen to about 33%. In contrast, the proportion of Japanese brands experienced decline about 10% during the same period, while that of American brands remained stable.

批改：整段总括了图表内容并逐一描述了图表中的各个数据，数据之间的变化描述地也较准确，可以多积累表变化的动词如increase/drop，以及表程度的副词如dramatically/significantly/steadily，还有描述最大最小值的短语如account for the largest proportion等

原文：car

批改：“汽车”的表达还可以用automobile，可以有意识去灵活表达

原文：cost-effectiveness

批改：这里指的其实是有竞争力的价格，可以说 “competitive price”

原文：so they tend to prefer them when choosing a car

批改：tend to 和 prefer 意义有重叠的部分，改为 so they tend to choose them 或 so they prefer choosing them

原文：The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, In recent years, with the decrease in prices and the improvement in quality, domestic car brands have gained growing popularity. An increasing number of people are attracted by the cost-effectiveness and exquisite appearance of domestic cars. In addition, as China"s national strength continues to grow, people have shown greater confidence in domestic brands, so they tend to prefer them when choosing a car. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

批改：这一段落运用了逻辑连词，主要从国产汽车品牌的价格和质量优势、综合国力提升等两个大方面入手，建议先用一句话引出自己的观点：”国产汽车品牌份额呈持续上升的趋势“，围绕这一趋势思考为什么？可以从国家（综合国力提升）-市场/企业（国产品牌自身优势）-个人（居民购买力提升）的角度展开论述会更有条理

原文：with the decrease in prices and the improvement in quality, domestic car brands have gained growing popularity.

批改：整句话可以这样说 “Domestic automobile brand, favoured by more consumers, has been competitive both in its price and quality.

原文：seize the opportunity

批改：这一短语用的好，让人眼前一亮

原文：car

批改：删去

原文：automakers

批改：这里指的是国产汽车品牌制造商 domestic automakers

原文：What about the future trends? I am convinced that the market share of domestic car brands is likely to keep expanding in the next few years. Therefore, automakers need to seize the opportunity to produce better car products and continuously expand the market

批改：结尾预测未来国产汽车品牌的市场份额仍将继续扩大，其中做得很好的一点是从怎么做的角度收尾，对作为市场主体的汽车制造商提出了行动建议

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：10/15

1）内容上：概括了图表内容，数据及其变化描述也较准确；

2）语言上：有意识地运用丰富的词汇和短语，部分句子组织可以更准确，表达可以更地道；

3）结构上：运用了逻辑连词，有自己的写作角度；

4）学习建议：

文章有自己的行文逻辑，语言富有亮点，是较为完整的一篇文章。有待提升的主要有三方面，一是语言上多积累表变化的动词、表程度的副词和描述最大最小值的一些短语，描述图表会更准确和形象；二是内容上可以从国家-市场/企业-个人等主体展开，按“是什么（给观点）——为什么（析原因）——怎么做（提措施/做法）”的逻辑展开，这样主干各要点更清晰明了；三针对现象-原因型文章，主要分析是什么原因导致该种趋势或现象的发生，写作过程中按三个主体的角度串联论述逻辑会让文章更有条理，如：由于经济发展，综合国力提升——一方面人们购买力提升，另一方面国产品牌有着自身优势广受欢迎，从而使人们对国产品牌更有信心——因此国产汽车品牌份额呈持续上升

启航教育坚持『专业·敬业·服务好』的理念，深耕考研英语教研多年。本文精解的2011年考研英语二范文仅是冰山一角，更多考研英语二作文模板高分资料与免费批改服务，期待与每一位2027考研人在在线咨询中相遇。