作为考研英语备考的核心模块,2024年考研英语二大作文承载了大量学生的提分期待。本文带来的这篇批改例文,紧扣考研英语二作文范文常见话题,由启航教育资深英语教研团队逐句批改,详细标注语法、词汇与逻辑三大失分点,是考研英语写作提分的优质资料。
一、2024年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the chart below. In your essay, you should1) describe and interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. Write your answer in about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2024年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The bar chart clearly displays the percentage backdown of the acquiration of students" labor-practise class at a certain university. The percentage of learning from relevant knowledge takes the lead at 91.3%, followed by elevating the ability to practice at 84.8%. Factors such as enhancing the ability to collaborate and feeling the mood smooth are also considered, accounting for 32.6% and 54.4%, respectively.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summ-arized as follows. For starters, as the conductor orchestrating the sumphony of these changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build up education system, enabling university students to have ample opportunities for further education. On the top of it, in the wake of high-speed advancement of society, students"att-itudes towards the labor-practise have undergone significant changes; they are nolonger content with material enjoyment. That explains why they choose the acquiration of learning relevant knowledge. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choice of university students, serving as a microcosm of these changes in the era, and will likely remain stable in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:acquiration
批改:改为 main gains 更合适
原文:of
批改:改为 form
原文:The percentage of
批改:删去
原文: learning from
批改:改为 Learning
原文: the mood smooth
批改:feel 后面直接加形容词,改为 relieved
批改:开头段表达不错,清晰地阐述了图表内容
批改:语法正确
原文:sumphony
批改:symphony
原文:education system
批改:可数名词单数形式不能单独存在,改为 a sound education system
批改:这个原因分析和图中元素联系不大
原文:the labor-practise
批改:改为 practical labor courses
原文:labor-practise class
批改:改为 practical labor courses
原文:nolonger
批改:加空格 no longer
批改:内容表达不错,也比较具体,但是第一个原因与图中元素的联系要更强一点
批改:结尾段内容表达很好,也很具体
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:10分/ 15分
题目要求:总体上来说是切题的,表明的个人观点与图表的内容是贴合的
语言表达:存在几处语法和拼写问题,词汇表达不错,一些句式表达也很好
结构逻辑:文章的结构完整清晰,内容也比较丰富具体,原因分析需要针对图中占比最大的一两个元素,要有紧密联系
修改建议:1. 语法和内容表达问题结合作文批注仔细修改 2. 拼写要细心,之后可以多积累素材,自己多练练句子,进一步丰富自己的句式和观点储备,提高自己的表达,总的来说写的不错,加油!
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