2023年考研英语一大作文属于典型的图表作文,要求考生准确描述数据变化并深入解读现象。本文精解的这篇柱状图批改范例,完整覆盖考研英语一作文真题常考图表的描述思路,是考研英语图表类作文的标杆范例。
一、考研英语一2023年大作文题目
考研英语一2023年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay based on the picture below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2023年大作文批改例文
This picture describes a dragon boat competition. The center is two boats, many people rowing, and it seems that there are many watchers on the shore, even many Audience on the bridge to call on them. And on the right shore, a grandpa says"It"s very good. Our countryside"s dragon boat competition is more and more alive." with a grandma.
With the development of society, those traditional culture becomes more and more popular. What"s more, with delivery of the traditional culture, countryside becomes more and more alive. And this delivery can also connect different generations. Traditional culture need the nutrition of the fork soil and can feed conversely community construction.
What convinced me is that Chinese extraordinary traditional culture is the gift of the Chinese nation. Not least if we want to make Chinese extraordinary traditional culture carry forward in the new erea, we must make it creative transformation and innovative development. Promoting traditional culture is also conducive to attracting young people to return to their hometowns to start business and promote rural revitalization.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:he center is two boats, many people rowing, and it seems that there are many watchers on the shore, even many Audience on the bridge to call on them. And on the right shore, a grandpa says
批改:The center is two boats, many people rowing:这是典型的中式英语和句子结构错误。可以改为 In the center, there are two boats with many people rowing vigorously. watchers, Audience:watchers不常用,spectators或 onlookers更地道。Audience作为集合名词,首字母不应大写,且前面不用 many修饰,可以说 a large audience。 to call on them:call on有“号召、拜访”的意思,这里想表达“加油、欢呼”,可以用 cheering for them。 a grandpa says... with a grandma:表达不自然。可以改为 an elderly man says to his wife (a grandma)..
原文:t seems that there are many watchers on the shore, even many Audience on the bridge to call on them. And on the right shore, a grandpa says"It"s very good. Our countryside"s dragon boat competition is more and more alive." with a grandm
批改:你捕捉到了图片中的核心元素(龙舟、观众、老人的话),这是好的开始
原文:development of society, those traditional culture becomes more and more popular. What"s more, with delivery of the traditional culture, countryside becomes more and more alive. And this delivery c
批改:those traditional culture:culture在这里是不可数名词,those应改为 that,或者直接说 traditional culture。 becomes:主语 culture不可数,谓语动词应用第三人称单数 becomes。这里你写对了,但前面搭配错了。 delivery:用词不当。“传承”应该用 inheritance或 revival。 connect different generations:这个表达很好! need the nutrition of the fork soil and can feed conversely community construction:这个比喻很有想法,但表达不清晰且用词错误。fork soil可能是想表达“乡土”,可用 native soil。feed conversely不成立。整个句子可改为 Traditional culture needs the nourishment of its native soil, and in return, it can foster community development.
原文:e development of society, those traditional culture becomes more and more popular. What"s more, with delivery of the traditional culture, countryside becomes more and more alive. And this delivery can also connect different generations. Traditional culture need the nutrition of the fork soil and can feed conversely community constru
批改:你尝试深入分析传统文化复兴的意义,思路是对的,提到了对乡村的振兴和代际联系,甚至用了比喻。但关键词汇的选用和句子结构存在较多问题,导致想表达的核心思想没有被准确、流畅地传达出来。
原文: convinced me is that Chinese extraordinary traditional culture is the gift of the Chinese nation. Not least if we want to make Chinese extraordinary traditional culture carry forward in the new erea, we must
批改:What convinced me is that:开头稍显突兀,可以改为 I am convinced that...。 Chinese extraordinary traditional culture:语序应为 China"s extraordinary traditional culture。 Not least if we want to...:Not least使用不当,导致句子不完整。可以删除,直接以 If we want to...开头。 new erea:拼写错误,应为 new era。 make it creative transformation:动词 make和名词 transformation搭配不当。应为 achieve its creative transformation或 carry out creative transformation of it。 start business:通常指“创办一个公司”,这里用 start businesses或 pursue careers更合适。
原文:. Not least if we want to make Chinese extraordinary traditional culture carry forward in the new erea, we must make it creative transformation and innovative development. Promoting traditional culture is also conducive to attracting young people to return to their hometowns to start business and promote rural revitaliz
批改:结尾段提出了个人观点和措施,内容上有价值
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:16
你的作文包含了图片描述、意义分析和措施建议,结构意识是有的。但是,全文在词汇、语法和句子结构上存在大量错误
从写正确的简单句开始:请暂时放弃复杂的长句和花哨的词汇。优先确保你能写出语法正确的“主谓宾”或“主系表”简单句。例如,把 The center is two boats, many people rowing这样容易出错的结构,拆成两个简单句:There are two boats in the center. Many people are rowing on them.虽然简单,但绝对正确。
精准使用核心词汇:集中精力掌握一批与常见话题(如文化、社会、环境)相关的核心名词和动词。不确定的搭配和用法,宁可换一个更简单、有把握的词。
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