作为考研英语备考的核心模块,2024年考研英语一大作文承载了大量学生的提分期待。本文带来的这篇批改例文,紧扣考研英语一写作技巧常见话题,由启航教育资深英语教研团队逐句批改,详细标注语法、词汇与逻辑三大失分点,是考研英语写作提分的优质资料。
一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目
考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文
There are a group of drawing and chart, vividly illustrated importance of parks in daily life. In the drawing, there is a park, some residents are doing exercise in the park. A person of them say "This nearby newly-built park is quite great." Meanwhile, the right chart presents that the number of parks obriously increased, from 406 in 2020 to 670 in 2022.
This scene, obviously, can be associated with Chinese increasingly rich life. Undoubtly, in recent years, China has be characteriaed by its economic boom and prosperity, which has enabled the government to have more budgets to build infractructures, incleuding parks and museuons. This phenonenon is particularly worth attention, for reason that parks can bring residents places to relax and do sports, inspire their passion for life and help enjoy convenience and the green environnent.
To sum up, whole society is supposed to foster optimistic atmosphere to protect the harmonious and beautiful environment of parks. In addition, it is advisible for everyone to bear in mind that parks are our homelands.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:a group of
批改:a group of后加名词复数
原文:illustrated
批改:illustrating
原文:importance
批改:前加the
原文:some
批改:前加and连接两个并列句
原文:say
批改:says单三
原文:obriously
批改:obviously
原文:There are a group of drawing and chart, vividly illustrated importance of parks in daily life. In the drawing, there is a park, some residents are doing exercise in the park. A person of them say "This nearby newly-built park is quite great." Meanwhile, the right chart presents that the number of parks obriously increased, from 406 in 2020 to 670 in 2022.
批改:对图画中的细节描述的很全面,但是要避免小的语言问题。
原文:Undoubtly
批改:undoubtedly
原文:be
批改:been
原文:characteriaed
批改:characterized
原文:incleuding
批改:including
原文:infractructures
批改:infrastructures
原文:museuons
批改:museums
原文:phenonenon
批改:phenomenon
批改:家to
原文:This scene, obviously, can be associated with Chinese increasingly rich life. Undoubtly, in recent years, China has be characteriaed by its economic boom and prosperity, which has enabled the government to have more budgets to build infractructures, incleuding parks and museuons. This phenonenon is particularly worth attention, for reason that parks can bring residents places to relax and do sports, inspire their passion for life and help enjoy convenience and the green environnent.
批改:论述的内容较为全面,运用逻辑关系词使得句与句之间衔接较为紧密。注意避免小的语言问题。
原文:To sum up, whole society is supposed to foster optimistic atmosphere to protect the harmonious and beautiful environment of parks. In addition, it is advisible for everyone to bear in mind that parks are our homelands.
批改:起到了呼吁和号召的作用,紧扣主题,语言连贯完整。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:14/20
内容切题,全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面,注意避免拼写错误;句式方面,句子结构完整连贯;语法方面,注意主谓一致问题以及一句话只能有一个谓语。逻辑结构清晰完整,论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子,结构清晰。
修改建议:可以看出作文完成的比较认真,无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰,值得表扬。如果能够再注意避免以上的一些小的细节问题会更好。继续加油。
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