考研英语一2024年大作文真题与例文批改

考研英语作文失分点多、提分空间大，一直是2024年考研英语一备考生核心痛点之一。本文围绕考研英语一作文真题话题，给出一篇经过启航教育老师精细批改的高分范文，文中不仅有逐句批注，还附有可复制的考研英语一高分写作模板。

一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目

考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文

In the left-hand cartoon, there is a boy, standing in the park where citizens are excercising, and the boy saying proudly: "It"s really nice that the renewed park near my home!" Simutaneously, in the right-hand bar chart, the number of park in a certain city experiened a significant increase of 264 from 2020 to 2022.

The core reasons of the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound healthy system, enabling citizens to have ample opportunities for excercise near at home. In addition, as we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

what about future trends? I am confident that the number of park will steadily increase in the following decades. At the same time, the number of excercise people will likely continue to increase.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文： saying proudly: "It"s really nice that the renewed park near my home!" Simutaneously, in the right-hand bar chart, the number of park in a certain city experiened a significant increase of 264 from 2020 to 2022.

批改：第一段成功地将漫画与图表信息结合起来，完成了引言的任务

原文：e excercising, and the boy saying proudly: "It"s really nice that the renewed park near my home!" Simutaneously, in the right-hand bar chart, the number of park i

批改：excercising -> exercising (拼写错误) Simutaneously -> Simultaneously (拼写错误) the number of park -> the number of parks (park 应为复数) experiened -> experienced (拼写错误)

原文： a boy, standing in the park where citizens are excercising, and the boy saying proudly: "It"s really nice that the renewed park near my home!" Simutaneously, in the right-hand bar chart, t

批改：the boy saying proudly 语法不完整，应改为 and the boy says proudly 以构成并列谓语。

原文：reasons of the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound healthy system, enabling citizens to have ample opportunities for excerc

批改：reasons of -> reasons for (固定搭配) excercise -> exercise (拼写错误) near at home -> near home 或 close to home (避免重复)

原文：e reasons of the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound healthy system, enabling citizens to have ample opportunities for excercise near at home. In addition, as we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

批改：本段的原因分析视角宏大，逻辑清晰

原文：what about future trends? I a

批改：句首的 what 应大写为 What。 the number of park -> the number of parks (名词复数) excercise people -> people who exercise 或 exercisers (更地道的表达)

原文：ut future trends? I am confident that the number of park will steadily increase in the following decades. At the same time, the number of excercise people will likely continue to increase.

批改：结尾段对未来做出了合理的预测，完成了任务

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：16

同学，你的这篇作文最突出的优点在于结构严谨，逻辑清晰，并且能够运用高级的句式和词汇（如 as the conductor orchestrating...）来提升文章档次。你对现象背后的原因分析也非常到位。

你的作文已经具备了冲击高分的潜力。如果希望在现有良好的基础上再进一步，老师建议你重点关注以下两点：

追求极致的准确性：当前影响你分数的主要是一些可以避免的拼写错误（如 exercise）和名词单复数问题。请务必在写作后快速检查这些高频词，确保其拼写和用法100%正确。

优化词汇搭配：在追求表达丰富性的同时，要特别关注介词搭配（如 reasons for）和词组的地道性（如 near home）。有时，使用一个准确简单的词，比使用一个搭配不当的高级词效果更好。

如果你也想让自己的考研英语一作文拿到理想分数，可以将本文的范文与老师批注作为标杆反复研读。同时，启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班已正式启动报名，在线咨询可获考研英语一作文真题高分资料礼包。