2015年考研英语二大作文实例分析与批改

想在考研英语二大作文中写出有深度的论证段落？本文精解的2015年考研英语二真题范文，从论据选择、过渡句使用到结尾点题都极具参考价值。启航教育考研英语教研组对该篇范文的批注，有助于考生建立完善的写作逻辑。

一、2015年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2015年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2015年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of The proportion of spending by residents in a certain city in China during the Spring Festival holiday. Festival day present takes the lead at 40%. Additionally, factors such as transportation,dinner party, and so on are also considered, accounting for 20%, 20%, and 20%, respectively.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start one with, Chinese society is undergoing an extensive and profound transformation. In my view,the fundamental reason for this phenomenon is the significant progress made by China"s economic development in responding to these changes.In addition,As the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to drive economic growth and elevate the purchasing power of the populace, allowing them to afford consumer goods that were previously deemed luxury items. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of people, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely rem ain relatively stable in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文： Additionally, factors such as transportation,dinner party, and so on are also considered, accounting for 20%, 20%, an

批改：and so on（等等）在图表描述中应避免，需要明确列出所有类别或使用“other categories”。 在饼图中，三项各占20%的表述虽然数学上可能，但结合前文的40%，逻辑上意味着四项总和为100%，这与“等等”矛盾。描述不够精准。

原文：art clearly displays the percentage breakdown of The proportion of spending by residents in a certain city in China during the Spring Festival holiday. Festival day present takes the lead at 40%. Additionally, factors such as transportation,dinner party, and so on are also considered, accounting for 20%, 20%, and 20%, respectively.

批改：本段成功引出了核心数据，但主要问题在于用词不准确和表达冗余。

原文：start one

批改：语法错误：固定短语是 To start with，one 是多余的。

原文：ore reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start one with, Chinese society is undergoing an extensive and profound transformation. In my view,the fundamental reason for this phenomenon is the significant progress made by China"s economic development in responding to these changes.In addition,As the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to drive economic growth and elevate the purchasing power of the populace, allowing them to afford consumer goods that were previously deemed luxury items. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

批改：本段试图构建两个论点，但存在逻辑衔接松散和表达风格不符的问题。第一个论点（社会转型）过于宽泛，第二个论点（政府作用）的比喻不恰当。你需要让每个句子都紧密地为“解释图表现象”服务，并使用更直接、严谨的论述语言。

原文：rem ain rel

批改：拼写错误：rem ain 应为 remain。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：9分

总评：

同学，你的文章结构意识很强，这是你的优势。当前阶段，我们攻坚的重点非常明确：第一，追求语言的准确与地道，摒弃华而不实的表达；第二，强化论述逻辑，让每一句话都紧扣主题。

修改建议在考场上，请优先使用你完全有把握的词汇和句型。与其冒险用一个拼错或用错的“大词”，不如用一个简单但百分百正确的“小词”。

写完每个论点后，问自己一句：“这句话如何直接解释了图表中的某一项数据？”比如，把“购买力提升”和“更能买得起礼物”直接联系起来。

如果写结尾，请用一句话总结图表反映的核心现象即可，例如：“In conclusion, the chart highlights the evolving consumption patterns during the Spring Festival.”

无论你是2026年考生还是备战2027考研英语，精读本文的2015年考研英语二批改范例都能为你的写作带来提升。启航教育的写作主讲与AI智能批改系统全天候待命，为你的考研英语二写作技巧冲刺保驾护航。