考研英语二写作冲刺每年的命题都会折射出当年的社会热点。本文呈现的2016年考研英语二批改范例,从生活实际出发,紧扣命题意图。启航教育老师在批注中详细指出了图(表)描述、原因分析与建议评论的合理答题节奏。
一、考研英语二2016年大作文题目
考研英语二2016年大作文Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and2) give your comments.You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET.
二、考研英语二2016年大作文批改例文
The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of various purpose of traveling among students at acertain university, Relieving stress takes the lead at 33%.followed by enjoying views at 37%. Additionally, factors such as making widely friends, cultivating in dependence and else are also considered, accounting for 9%,6%and15%,respectively.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, university students are no longer content with mere material satisfaction,they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why an increasing number of university students choose enjoying views. In addition, as the saying goes,"on life"stage, pressure is always present."Nowdays,university students are compelled to confront immense academic pressure,and as a result, Relieving stress has emerged as their significant choice in traveling.
what about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of university students, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stablein following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:acertain
批改:注意单词空格
原文:Relieving stress takes the lead at 33%.followed by enjoying views at 37%
批改:两者顺序反了,注意区别数字大小
原文:widely
批改:删除
原文: in dependence
批改:independence
原文:The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of various purpose of traveling among students at acertain university, Relieving stress takes the lead at 33%.followed by enjoying views at 37%. Additionally, factors such as making widely friends, cultivating in dependence and else are also considered, accounting for 9%,6%and15%,respectively.
批改:用具体数据描述图表内容,清晰直观,但是建议在段落后面补充这些数据反映的社会现象
原文:The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, university students are no longer content with mere material satisfaction,they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why an increasing number of university students choose enjoying views. In addition, as the saying goes,"on life"stage, pressure is always present."Nowdays,university students are compelled to confront immense academic pressure,and as a result, Relieving stress has emerged as their significant choice in traveling.
批改:以分论点的形式论述这一现象背后的原因,逻辑严谨,层次分明。
原文:what about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of university students, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stablein following decades.
批改:总结全文,升华主题,展望未来,立意深远。
原文:stablein
批改:stable in注意单词空格
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:12 /15
这篇文章内容完整充实,结构清晰合理,逻辑严谨,层次分明,句型表达丰富。
首段总体概括图表主题,详细列出关键数据变化;第二段分析原因,可从社会就业压力增大、学生追求自我实现等方面进行论述;第三段评论与展望,预测未来趋势可能持续,并强调其对个人和社会发展的积极意义。
文章整体来说,言简意赅,符合了考试写作提纲的要求,文章表示语义衔接的词语运用不太多,在以后的写作中可以多尝试使用一些表示衔接的词语,这样文章段落内部句内和段落之间的关系就能很明朗的表现出来。同时注意避免单纯罗列数据,可适当引用社会现象或政策背景支持分析,增强说服力。
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