考研英语二2016年大作文失分点批改

2016年考研英语二大作文是启航考研英语备考清单中的必练题型。本文带来的高分批改范例，配套启航教育老师的逐句批注与预测话题标签，适合考研英语考生在冲刺阶段精读精练，是一套完整的写作提升资料。

一、考研英语二2016年大作文题目

考研英语二2016年大作文Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and2) give your comments.You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET.

二、考研英语二2016年大作文批改例文

The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of various purposes of traveling among students at a certain university. Enjoying scenery takes the lead at 37%, followed by relieving pressure at 33%. Additionally, factors such as making friends, cultivating independence, and other purposes are also considered, accounting for 9%, 6% and 15%, respectively.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, university students are no longer content with mere material satisfaction; they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why enjoying scenery has become the top choice for traveling of university students. In addition, as the saying goes, “On life’s stage, pressure is always present.” Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense academic pressure, and as a result, traveling has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of university students, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

批改：语法正确

原文：scenery

批改：加上 the 是最地道的表达，改为 the scenery

批改：开头段表达不错，清晰地阐述了图表内容

批改：语法正确

原文：scenery

批改：改为 the scenery

原文：of

批改：改为 among 更合适

批改：语法正确

批改：内容表达很好，也很具体

批改：结尾段内容表达很好

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：13分/ 15分

题目要求：总体上来说是切题的，表明的个人观点与图表的内容是贴合的

语言表达：存在几处语法问题，词汇表达不错，一些句式表达也很好

结构逻辑：文章的结构完整清晰，内容也比较丰富具体

修改建议：语法问题结合作文批注仔细修改，要细心，之后可以多积累素材，自己多练练句子，进一步丰富自己的句式和观点储备，提高自己的语言表达，总的来说写的不错，加油！

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