考研英语一2011年大作文真题与例文批改

一篇高分的考研英语大作文，常常具备结构清晰、句式多变、词汇地道三大特点。本文精解的2011年考研英语一批改范例，每一段都体现了这三大要素，启航教育考研英语一作文真题教研组对该范文进行了详细的亮点标注。

一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目

考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文

As shown in the picture, there are passengers on a boat throwing garbage into the water and ignoring the mess, which is full of trash. The caption “The ‘Remains’ of the Journey” points out this pollution. Evidently, the picture intends to convey to readers that environment pollution is an issue that needs great attention in both our daily lives and society.

This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, some travelers don’t care much about protecting the environment and only think about their own convenience. What’s more, their behavior makes water pollution worse and hurts the animals living in the water.

How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including telling people to protect the environment and setting up more trash cans in scenic spots. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to fine those who throw garbage randomly. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：As shown in the picture, there are passengers on a boat throwing garbage into the water and ignoring the mess, which is full of trash. The caption “The ‘Remains’ of the Journey” points out this pollution. Evidently, the picture intends to convey to readers that environment pollution is an issue that needs great attention in both our daily lives and society.

批改：对图画内容描述的很全面，且能够清晰点明主题。

原文：This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, some travelers don’t care much about protecting the environment and only think about their own convenience. What’s more, their behavior makes water pollution worse and hurts the animals living in the water.

批改：该段落能够将图画背后蕴含的真实意义加以阐述，语言衔接连贯。

原文：How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including telling people to protect the environment and setting up more trash cans in scenic spots. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to fine those who throw garbage randomly. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.

批改：能够提出自己的建议，起到了总结和再次呼应主题的作用。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：17/20

内容切题，准确全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面，无拼写错误；句式方面，句子结构完整连贯；语法方面，语法基础较好。逻辑结构清晰完整，论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子，结构清晰。

修改建议：可以看出作文完成的非常认真，无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰，值得表扬，继续加油。

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