考研英语一2024年大作文真题与例文批改

考研英语作文失分点多、提分空间大，一直是2024年考研英语一备考生核心痛点之一。本文围绕考研英语一作文模板话题，给出一篇经过启航教育老师精细批改的高分范文，文中不仅有逐句批注，还附有可复制的考研英语一高分写作模板。

一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目

考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文

In the left-hand picture,there is a boy,standing on the grass,and saying “The new park that was built in front of my house is so good”.In his back,there are two people running for exercise.On the contrary,in the right-hand portrayal parks expends further during the past three years by a graph.Evidently,the picture intends to convey to readers that it is park becomes more that play an important and positive role both in our lives and society.

This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways,but two of them are particularly significant.On the one hand,park can provide a site that people can exercise free and comfortable,it has very plants which can green the city and make more oxygen for us. On the other hand,there still have destructive activities ,rubbish pollution,natural disasters leads negative consequences of park.

In brief,Park development is the catalyst for societal and personal development,from which we all stand to benefit.Therefore,we should actively support this practice.Only by doing so can we create a happier life.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：ft-hand picture,there is a boy,standing on the grass,and saying “The new park that was built in front of my house is so good”.In his back,there are two people running for exercise.On the contrary,in the right-hand portrayal parks expends further during the past three years by a graph.Evidently,the picture intends to convey to readers that it is park becomes more that play an important and positive role both in our lives and society.

批改：你成功描述了图片和图表的基本信息，并且尝试总结深层含义，这点很棒！

原文：.On the one hand,park can provide a site that people can exercise free and comfortable,it has very plants which can green the city and make more oxygen for us. On the other hand,there still have destructive activities ,rubbish pollution,natural disasters leads negative consequences of park.

批改：本段从正反两方面论述，思路很有辩证性！正面论述（公园的好处）很清晰。反面论述（公园面临的问题）这个角度本身很好，但可以更紧密地联系到“为什么公园数量还在增加”这个核心现象上。比如，可以指出“正是由于这些问题存在，才更需要我们好好管理和保护公园”，这样逻辑就更顺了

原文：d to benefit.Therefore,we should actively support this practice.Only by doing so can we create a happier life.

批改：结尾段总结了观点并发出呼吁，结构完整。

原文：ef,Park devel

批改：Park-> Park​ (首字母大写)

原文：ave destructive activities ,rubbish pollution,natural disasters leads negative consequences of par

批改：park-> Parks​ (全文讨论的是复数概念) exercise free and comfortable-> exercise freely and comfortably​ (应用副词修饰动词) it has very plants-> 这是一个“逗号粘连”错误，且表达不完整。可改为：Additionally, the numerous plants in parks can help green the city and produce oxygen. there still have-> there are still​ (正确的“有”的表达是 there are) leads-> that lead to​ (定语从句，主语是前面的并列活动)

原文：his back,there are two people running for exercise.On the contrary,in the right-hand portrayal parks expends further during the past three years by a graph.Evidently,the picture intends to c

批改：In his back-> Behind him​ (更地道的表达) portrayal-> chart/graph​ (右边的应是图表，用“chart”更准确) parks expends-> the number of parks expanded​ (主语应为“公园的数量”) by a graph-> 可改为 as shown in the graph​ (更自然的引入方式) it is park becomes more that play...-> 这个句子结构有些缠绕。可以简化为：...that the increasing number of parks plays an important and positive role in both our lives and society.

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：15

同学，你这篇作文最突出的优点是具有辩证思维的潜力和使用高级词汇的意愿。这非常宝贵！当前，提升作文层次的关键在于表达的准确性和逻辑的严密性。

我为你总结两个最实用的建议：

先求准确，再求华丽：在使用复杂句之前，先确保简单句的主谓宾是清晰、正确的。比如，牢牢掌握“there be”句型、主谓一致等基本规则，这是写出所有正确句子的基石。

如果你也想让自己的考研英语一作文拿到理想分数，可以将本文的范文与老师批注作为标杆反复研读。同时，启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班已正式启动报名，在线咨询可获考研英语一作文模板高分资料礼包。