作为考研英语备考的核心模块,2021年考研英语二大作文承载了大量学生的提分期待。本文带来的这篇批改例文,紧扣考研英语二真题常见话题,由启航教育资深英语教研团队逐句批改,详细标注语法、词汇与逻辑三大失分点,是考研英语写作提分的优质资料。
一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The bar chart clearly depicts different ways of physical exercise in a city. Exercising alone takes the lead at 54.5%, followed by exercising with friends at 47.1%. Additionally, factors such as exercising with family, and group activities ae also considered, accounting for 23.9% and 15.8%, respectively.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can summarized as follows. To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people"s attitudes towards of exercise hove undergone significant change, people are no longer concent with mere material satisfaction; they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why an increasing number of people choose green transportation rather than truditional fuel-based options. In addition we all know, the outbreak of COVIO-19 impacted every aspect of our lives, consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health.
What about future trends? I think that exercise is important.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:e bar chart clearly depicts different ways of physical exercise in a city. Exercising alone takes the lead at 54.5%, followed by exercising with friends at 47.1%. Additionally, factors such as exercising with family, and group activities ae also considered, accounting for 23.9% and 15.8%, respectively.
批改: 本段成功列出了图表中的所有数据,并正确指出了排名
原文:core reasons for the observed phenomenon can summarized as follows. To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people"s attitudes towards of exercise hove undergone significant change, people are no longer concent with mere material satisfaction; they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why an increasing number of people choose green transportation rather than truditional fuel-based options. In addition we all know, the outbreak of COVIO-19 impacted every aspect of our lives, consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health.
批改:本段尝试分析原因,思路是好的。
原文:can summarized as follows. To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, peop
批改:can summarized-> can be summarized(缺少助动词 be) attitudes towards of exercise-> attitudes towards exercise(删除多余介词 of) hove-> have(拼写修正)
原文:ather than truditional fuel-based options. In addition we all know, the outbreak of COVIO-19 impacted every aspect of
批改:people are no longer concent with-> people are no longer content with(“满足于”是 content with) truditional-> traditional(拼写修正) COVIO-19-> COVID-19(拼写修正)
原文:about future trends? I think that exercise is imp
批改:结论段需要充实内容,对未来趋势做出合理的预测,使文章结构更完整
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:11
总评与建议:
同学,你的作文结构完整,数据描述清晰,这是写好图表作文的重要基础!当前的提升关键在于增强论述的针对性和完整性。
让分析紧扣图表数据:在分析原因时,请紧密围绕图表中最突出的现象(即“不同锻炼方式的选择比例”)展开思考,避免引入关联度不高的例子。
确保内容完整:结论段需要展开,对未来趋势做出合理的预测,这是图表作文的重要组成部分。
仔细检查语法与拼写:请注意基本语法结构(如can be summarized)和常见词汇的拼写。
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