启航教育在考研英语写作教学中反复强调:词汇与句式的高级化是考研英语作文高分的关键。本文整理的2021年考研英语二批改范例,几乎每一段都包含高分替换词与衔接词,是考研英语二作文范文写作锦囊中的代表性范文。
一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The bar chart clearly depicts a survey about people’s choices of doing exercise at certain city .The number of doing exercise alone takes the lead at percent 54.3,followed by the number of doing exercise with friends at percent 47.7.Additionally,factors such as doing exercise with family and doing team sports are also considered,account for percent 23.9 and percent 15.8,respectively.
The core reasons for this observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with,in the wake of high-speed advancement of society, people are no longer content with the material satisfaction,they also purse spiritual satisfaction by doing exercise to fulfill the needs.In addition,against the backdrop of our country’s rapid and dynamic development,more and more people are not worry about the basic living assurance.This explains the hight percentage of the survey.Considering these factors,the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends?I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truth fully reflect the choices of people,serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era,and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:percent 54.3
批改:percent 放在数字后面,下同
原文:percent 47.7
批改:percent 放在数字后面
原文:account
批改:accounting
原文:The bar chart clearly depicts a survey about people’s choices of doing exercise at certain city .The number of doing exercise alone takes the lead at percent 54.3,followed by the number of doing exercise with friends at percent 47.7.Additionally,factors such as doing exercise with family and doing team sports are also considered,account for percent 23.9 and percent 15.8,respectively.
批改:用具体数据描述图表内容,清晰直观,但是建议在段落后面补充这些数据反映的社会现象
原文: purse
批改:pursue
原文:worry
批改:worried
原文:The core reasons for this observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with,in the wake of high-speed advancement of society, people are no longer content with the material satisfaction,they also purse spiritual satisfaction by doing exercise to fulfill the needs.In addition,against the backdrop of our country’s rapid and dynamic development,more and more people are not worry about the basic living assurance.This explains the hight percentage of the survey.Considering these factors,the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:以分论点的形式论述这一现象背后的原因,逻辑严谨,层次分明。
原文:What about future trends?I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truth fully reflect the choices of people,serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era,and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
批改:总结全文,升华主题,展望未来,立意深远。
原文:truth fully
批改:truthfully
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:12/15
这篇文章内容完整充实,结构清晰合理,逻辑严谨,层次分明,句型表达丰富。
语法:语言表达和语法基础上,进步的空间还很大。比如本次作文中出现多次的单词拼写错误等问题,会很拉低你的平均分。另外还需要注意一些基础的语法问题和表达搭配问题,有时间好好看看文中的批改,细心吸收,争取在接下来的练习中避免类似的错误。
首段总体概括图表主题,呈现各锻炼方式的占比数据,突出独自锻炼占比最高这一核心特征。第二段原因分析,可从现代生活节奏快、个人时间安排灵活、社交网络有限等角度展开。第三段可结合当前趋势,合理推测未来锻炼方式的发展方向,如独自锻炼可能持续流行,同时建议增加家庭和团体锻炼以促进社交与健康。
文章整体来说,言简意赅,符合了考试写作提纲的要求,文章表示语义衔接的词语运用不太多,在以后的写作中可以多尝试使用一些表示衔接的词语,这样文章段落内部句内和段落之间的关系就能很明朗的表现出来。同时注意避免单纯罗列数据,可适当引用社会现象或政策背景支持分析,增强说服力。
对每一位2027考研人而言,考研英语二作文范文都是冲刺阶段必须攻克的难关。启航教育陪伴一届又一届学子走向考研英语写作高分,本文精解的2021年考研英语二范文正是经典参考之一。欢迎关注启航教育,了解更多考研英语备考干货。
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