2015年考研英语二大作文是考研英语作文模板备考清单中的必练题型。本文带来的高分批改范例,配套启航教育老师的逐句批注与预测话题标签,适合考研英语考生在冲刺阶段精读精练,是一套完整的写作提升资料。
一、2015年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2015年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2015年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The pie clearly displays the percentage breakdown of the proportion of spending during the Spring Festival holiday in a certain city if our courtry. The gift of Spring Festival takes the lead at 40%,followed by traffic, meeting and eating and else.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with. In the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people"s attitudes towards friends and family, being no longer content with mere material satisfaction; they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why an increasing number of people choose presenting gift to family or friends. In addition, as we know, the outbreak of Covid -19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying
more attention to interpersonal relationship. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chare is the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choice of people of China, serving as a microcosm of changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:e pie clearl
批改:pie 在学术写作中建议使用完整形式 pie chart
原文:if our cour
批改:if our courtry 存在拼写错误,应为 in our country
原文:traffic, meeting and eat
批改:traffic, meeting and eating and else 这个列举存在三个问题:1) traffic 应改为 transportation 以准确表示“交通出行”花费;2) meeting and eating 建议合并为 dining and gatherings;3) and else 不符合英语习惯,应直接说明 other categories。
原文:e pie clearly displays the percentage breakdown of the proportion of spending during the Spring Festival holiday in a certain city if our courtry. The gift of Spring Festival takes the lead at 40%,followed by traffic, meeting and eating and else.
批改:本段最大的问题是信息不完整。你提到了“其他”占20%,但没有明确说明“交通”、“聚会吃饭”也同样各占20%,这会让读者对图表的理解产生偏差。
原文:ple"s attitudes towards
批改:第一点原因的句子结构混乱,people"s attitudes..., being no longer content...; they also... 这是一个典型的串句(Run-on sentence)。应重构句子,例如:People are no longer content with mere material satisfaction and increasingly pursue spiritual enjoyment, which explains why many choose to give gifts to family and friends.
原文:f Covid -19 has impa
批改:第二点原因提到COVID-19,这是一个严重的逻辑错误。题目图表数据是2015年的,而疫情发生在2020年之后。用尚未发生的事件去解释过去的现象,这在议论文中是致命的硬伤。 presenting gift 应为 presenting gifts。 in the chare is the chart 显然是笔误,应为 in the chart。
原文:ore reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with. In the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people"s attitudes towards friends and family, being no longer content with mere material satisfaction; they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why an increasing number of people choose presenting gift to family or friends. In addition, as we know, the outbreak of Covid -19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to interpersonal relationship. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chare is the chart is unsurprising.
批改:本段的分析在逻辑上出现了重大问题。虽然你试图从“精神需求”和“人际关系”角度分析,这本身是对的,但论据(疫情)的选择严重失误,直接影响了论证的有效性。在分析图表时,所有原因都应基于图表数据所处时代的背景。
原文:t about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choice of people of China, serving as a microcosm of changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
批改:对未来趋势进行评论
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:6分
第二段关于疫情的分析,这是一个非常严重的逻辑错误,是我们在写作中必须避免的。这直接导致了内容要点上的重大失分。
此外,第一段的信息不完整和第三段过于绝对的预测,也影响了整体得分。
给你的核心建议:
严守逻辑与时间线:在分析任何图表或现象时,你给出的所有原因、论据都必须是在图表数据时间点之前或当时已经发生的事情。绝不能使用未来发生的事去解释过去。
保证信息完整准确:描述图表时,要像做汇报一样,确保所有关键数据点都无一遗漏且准确无误地呈现出来。
先求准确,再求华丽:在时间紧迫的考场上,如果复杂句式没有把握,就先用几个正确的简单句把意思说清楚。一个语法正确、表意清晰的简单句,远胜过一个错误百出、逻辑混乱的长难句。
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