考研英语一2016年大作文写作方向与示例

当你坐在考研英语一考场，面对2016年大作文题目的那一瞬间，是否能快速组织起一篇结构清晰、表达地道的高分文章？本文这篇批改例文，正是考研英语一写作冲刺话题下的标准范本，适合每一位考研英语备考生反复研读。

一、考研英语一2016年大作文题目

考研英语一2016年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following pictures. In your essay, you should1) describe the pictures briefly, 2) interpret the meaning, and3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2016年大作文批改例文

In the left-hand picture, there are two people in the picture. A son and a farther, son is sitting at the desk and do the homework. But farther is watching TV. In the right-hand picture, there are also two people in the picture. a son and a farther, but the farther is studying with the son, Evidently, the picture intends to convey to readers that positive example is the brush that paints a bright furture, while negative example is the shackle that hinders progress.

This phenomenon is thought-prowking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. on the one hand, positive example can nurture our souls, and promote personal growth and self-fullillment thus making life rewarding and meaningful, rather than being self-consuming. on the other hand, negative example not only hinders children"s success, but also acts as an Achilles" heel that can turn a final step towards heaven lnto a stepping stone towards hell.

In brief, positive example is the catalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore we should actively support and advocate this practice; additionally, we must be acutely aware of the detrimental effects of negative example to ensure our growth stays on course

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：. A

批改：逗号，a小写

原文：,

批改：句号

原文：son

批改：前加the特指

原文：do

批改：单三does

批改：加the表示特指

原文：farther

批改：father

批改：逗号

原文：farther

批改：father

原文：farther

批改：father

原文：farther

批改：father

原文：In the left-hand picture, there are two people in the picture. A son and a farther, son is sitting at the desk and do the homework. But farther is watching TV. In the right-hand picture, there are also two people in the picture. a son and a farther, but the farther is studying with the son, Evidently, the picture intends to convey to readers that positive example is the brush that paints a bright furture, while negative example is the shackle that hinders progress.

批改：对图画中的细节描述的很全面，但是要避免小的语言问题。

原文：prowking

批改：provoking

原文：on

批改：On大写

原文：fullillment

批改：fulfillment后加逗号

原文：on

批改：首字母大写

原文：lnto

批改：首字母小写

原文：This phenomenon is thought-prowking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. on the one hand, positive example can nurture our souls, and promote personal growth and self-fullillment thus making life rewarding and meaningful, rather than being self-consuming. on the other hand, negative example not only hinders children"s success, but also acts as an Achilles" heel that can turn a final step towards heaven lnto a stepping stone towards hell.

批改：能够通过正反两方面进行论述来突出论点，能够运用逻辑关系词，使得句子之间衔接较为连贯。

原文：In brief, positive example is the catalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore we should actively support and advocate this practice; additionally, we must be acutely aware of the detrimental effects of negative example to ensure our growth stays on course

批改：能够提出自己的建议，起到了总结和再次呼应主题的作用。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：14/20

内容切题，全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面，注意避免拼写错误；句式方面，注意句子结构的完整以及正确使用标点断句；逻辑结构清晰完整，论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子，结构清晰。

修改建议：可以看出作文完成的比较认真，无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰，值得表扬。如果能够再注意避免以上的一些小的细节问题会更好。继续加油。

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