考研英语二2011年大作文失分点批改

2011年考研英语二大作文是考研英语作文模板备考清单中的必练题型。本文带来的高分批改范例，配套启航教育老师的逐句批注与预测话题标签，适合考研英语考生在冲刺阶段精读精练，是一套完整的写作提升资料。

一、考研英语二2011年大作文题目

考研英语二2011年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart and 2) give your comments. You should write at least 150 words. Write your essay on ANSWER SHEET 2. (15 points)

二、考研英语二2011年大作文批改例文

According to the chart, it can be seen that the number of brand of Japan and brand of China had apparent changes during the period from 2008 to 2009. To be specific, brand of Japan decrease suddenly from 35% to 25%. In the meanwhile, brand of China increase suddenly from 25% to 33%, and brand of US stand at during the some period. The chart"s information can be employed to conclude the following brand of China has been developing rapidly in recent years.

Several factors can account for this viewpoint. To begin with, for instance, I remembor that some people had chose to purchase cars from brand of China in my hometown. What"s more, The majority of people believe that brand of China will provide them with a secure environment when they buy a car. Last hut not least, It is well known that the selecting right brands plays a crucial role in everyone"s life safety.

It is not difficult to draw the conclusion that enough attention must be turned to select right brands of cars by ourselves and our community. For one thing, It is imperative for the government to make laws to cars brand. For another, Mass media, such as radios, televisions, newspapers and the Internet, should realistically report car brands. In this way, hopefully, we may have a much more wonderful environment

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：e number of brand

批改：“the number of brand”搭配错误，应为“the market share of brands”

原文：ecrease sudd

批改：动词时态（decrease/increase应为过去式）和词性（“stand at”后缺少数据）有误。

原文：cording to the chart, it can be seen that the number of brand of Japan and brand of China had apparent changes during the period from 2008 to 2009. To be specific, brand of Japan decrease suddenly from 35% to 25%. In the meanwhile, brand of China increase suddenly from 25% to 33%, and brand of US stand at during the some period. The chart"s information can be employed to conclude the following brand of China has been developing rapidly in recent years.

批改：使用更专业、准确的术语“market share”。 修正所有语法错误，补全美国品牌的数据，确保描述客观完整。 使用“while”和“in contrast”等连词，使对比更清晰，行文更流畅

原文：eral factors can account for this viewpoint. To begin with, for instance, I remembor that some people had chose to purchase cars from brand of China in my hometown. What"s more, The majority of people believe that brand of China will provide them with a secure environment when they buy a car. Last hut not least, It is well known that the selecting right brands plays a crucial role in everyone"s life safety.

批改：存在拼写（remembor, hut）

原文：had chose t

批改：时态（had chose）和表达（secure environment指代不明）问题。

原文：veral factors can account for this viewpoint. To begin with, for instance, I remembor that some people had chose to purchase cars from brand of China in my hometown. What"s more, The majority of people believe that brand of China will provide them with a secure environment when they buy a car. Last hut not least, It is well known that the selecting right brands plays a crucial role in everyone"s life safe

批改：提出“有竞争力的定价”和“技术、安全、设计的进步”这两个在商业世界中真实、可信的原因。

原文：not difficult to draw the conclusion that enough attention must be turned to select right brands of cars by ourselves and our community. For one thing, It is imperative for the government to make laws to cars brand. For another, Mass media, such as radios, televisions, newspapers and the Internet, should realistically report car brands. In this way, hopefully, we may have a much more wonderful environment

批改：上文在分析“市场份额变化的原因”，下文突然跳到“政府立法”和“媒体监督”，两者之间没有逻辑联系。图表并未涉及品牌造假或安全问题。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：11分

你已具备了从图表中抓取关键信息和搭建文章框架的意识，这是非常正确的起点

描述需精准完整：牢记“有什么，写什么”。图表中的所有关键数据（如图中美国品牌42%的份额）都应被客观、准确地描述，不可遗漏。

论证要客观相关：图表作文需要基于事实和逻辑进行分析。请用“竞争力提升”、“技术进步”等客观的商业逻辑替代“我家乡的例子”等主观个人经验。

结论应紧扣主题：结论必须是对上文描述和分析的自然总结与升华，不能引入一个全新的、无关的观点。

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