本文精选了一篇得分13分以上的2016年考研英语二大作文高分范例,并附启航老师对该范文的逐句批改。文中清晰展示了考研英语写作技巧评分细则中关于语法多样性、词汇丰富度与逻辑连贯性的得分技巧,是考研英语学习的高价值内容。
一、考研英语二2016年大作文题目
考研英语二2016年大作文Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and2) give your comments.You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET.
二、考研英语二2016年大作文批改例文
The purpose of travelling among high school students is what the piece chart tries to convey. To be specific, the proportion of relaxing and going sightseeing account for 37% and 33% respectively.
There seems to be more than one direct or indirect factor involved in the different proportion of the travel purpose. First and foremost, the pressure from the school is high, to some extent, inevitably brings great influence to the high proportion of the purpose to relax. Based upon a recent report from CISD, roughly 87% of the respondents hold the same view. What"s move, it is generally recognized that nothing is more important than the natural sightseeing for inspiring people"s innovation, which is caused the highest proportion of the purpose to go sightseeing, As Emily larter, professor at the university of lentral Lancashive, puts it,"the nature serves as an important factor in innovation."
What can be emphasized by the above is that the reason for different proportion of the travelling purpose is of great significance. Newspaper and new media should promote publicity of it.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:The purpose of travelling among high school students is what the piece chart tries to convey. To be specific, the proportion of relaxing and going sightseeing account for 37% and 33% respectively.
批改:用具体数据描述图表内容,清晰直观,但是建议在段落后面补充这些数据反映的社会现象
原文:high school
批改:高校一般指的是college,不是高中
原文: brings
批改:bringing 要用非谓语形式
原文:move
批改:more
原文: is caused
批改:causes 用主动形式的第三人称单数形式
原文:There seems to be more than one direct or indirect factor involved in the different proportion of the travel purpose. First and foremost, the pressure from the school is high, to some extent, inevitably brings great influence to the high proportion of the purpose to relax. Based upon a recent report from CISD, roughly 87% of the respondents hold the same view. What"s move, it is generally recognized that nothing is more important than the natural sightseeing for inspiring people"s innovation, which is caused the highest proportion of the purpose to go sightseeing, As Emily larter, professor at the university of lentral Lancashive, puts it,"the nature serves as an important factor in innovation."
批改:以分论点的形式论述这一现象背后的原因,逻辑严谨,层次分明。
原文:What can be emphasized by the above is that the reason for different proportion of the travelling purpose is of great significance. Newspaper and new media should promote publicity of it.
批改:总结全文,升华主题
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:13/15
这篇文章内容完整充实,结构清晰合理,逻辑严谨,层次分明,句型表达丰富。
语法:语言表达和语法基础上,进步的空间还很大。比如本次作文中出现单词拼写错误等问题,会很拉低你的平均分。另外还需要注意一些基础的语法问题和表达搭配问题,有时间好好看看文中的批改,细心吸收,争取在接下来的练习中避免类似的错误。
首段总体概括图表主题,详细列出关键数据变化;第二段分析原因;第三段评论与展望,预测未来趋势可能持续,并强调其对个人和社会发展的积极意义。
文章整体来说,言简意赅,符合了考试写作提纲的要求,文章表示语义衔接的词语运用不太多,在以后的写作中可以多尝试使用一些表示衔接的词语,这样文章段落内部句内和段落之间的关系就能很明朗的表现出来。
本文精解的2016年考研英语二范文,在启航教育AI智能批改系统中拿到了高分评价。快速揪出失分点,对着薄弱点学提升更快,是考研英语写作技巧备考的贴心帮手。扫码预约,免费体验考研英语作文AI智能批改。
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