考研英语一2011年大作文实例分析与批改

考研英语写作想要突破20分瓶颈，仅靠背诵远远不够，必须通过范文精读+专业批改双管齐下。本文带来的2011年考研英语一高分批改范例，涵盖考研英语一写作冲刺高频常考话题，逐句逐段剖析高分背后的逻辑链条。

一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目

考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文

As is symbolically depicted in the figure above,on a boat sit tourists,throwing rubbish garbage into the river and leaving a large amount of rubbish which is floating on the water.The drawing,undoubtedly,highlights the core idea that it is the environmental Protection that must deserve great attention by government and the folks.

In my Perspective, the advantages of environmental protection mainly lie in three aspects.Above all,the majority of citizens believe that environmental protection will improve the image and competitiveness of cities,which may put their city in a beneficial position in the future.Moreover, It is well known that environmental protection plays a crucial role in reducing pollution and improving the ecological environment.In the end,not only does environmental protection maintain natural ecological balance, but it also enables them to keep harmony between humanity and nature.

It is not difficult to draw the conclusion that enough attention must be turned to environmental protection by our community and government. It is necessary for the authorities to make strict laws to protect the environment.We should also enhance children and adults" awareness of environmental protection. In this way,hopefully, we may have a better future.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：rubbish garbage

批改：两个词一个意思，保留一个即可

原文：water

批改：改成river更合适一点

原文：the folks

批改：the public更合适

原文：by

批改：from

原文： them

批改：指代不清，改为people

原文：It is not difficult to draw the conclusion that enough attention must be turned to environmental protection by our community and government. It is necessary for the authorities to make strict laws to protect the environment.We should also enhance children and adults" awareness of environmental protection. In this way,hopefully, we may have a better future.

批改：没有问题

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：15/20

1.题目要求：词数合适，文章中也完成了描述漫画、揭示含义和给予评论三大任务，符合题目要求。

2.语言表达：文章中的语言表达基本准确，但存在一些可优化的地方。文章内有几处语法漏洞和拼写错误，同学在这一块还需要多留心注意。

3.行文逻辑：文章结构合理，分为开头、正文和结尾，层次分明。从描述漫画场景开始，逐步过渡到环境保护的重要性，最后提出解决方案。这样的逻辑是英语作文的标准，请继续保持。

4.建议：关于文章内出现的拼写错误和语法漏洞需要留心，每次写完之后养成通篇读一遍的习惯，在读的过程中就专注抓语法错误、拼写错误，一句话里的时态是否统一，名词的单复数是否正确以及是否应该加冠词。这些不必要犯的错误一定要扼杀掉！

这篇作文完成度不错。能够有效地传达漫画的深层含义，并提出了合理的建议。如果这篇作文是同学自己构思的，那我相信同学在克服语法和拼写问题后的英语成绩一定不会低。如果同学在写作时有参考范文，还是建议同学在练习时就养成自己动脑动手的习惯，这样在两个月后的考场上才能下笔如有神。非常棒！继续加油(ง •_•)ง，相信你一定能成功，Go Go!

本文展示的2011年考研英语一范文可以提炼为考研英语一写作冲刺的写作模板灵活复用。启航教育写作教研组归纳了6类常考话题高分模板，均纳入2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班，助你一次掌握考研英语作文的得分密码。