想在短时间内显著提升考研英语写作分数?研读高分范文并接受专业批改是高效的路径。本文整理的2011年考研英语一批改范例,从图表描述、原因分析到建议评论,每一段都渗透着考研英语写作锦囊热点话题的得分要点。
一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目
考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文
As shown in the cartoon, there are two people sitting on the boat, enjoying the scenery and throwing the garbage into the river, which contributes to environmental pollution. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environmental pollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal lives and in society.
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, tragically, although the lack of clear rules and behavioral standards might contribute to this phenomenon, its root cause lies in the fact that some individuals, in their pursuit of economic interests, have disregarded environmental pollution. What is more, environmental pollution is like a heavy chain that hinders our nation’s progress, not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth, but also significantly affecting its international competitiveness.
How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including issuing related laws and strengthen the guiding role of the media in public opinion. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to enhance supervision. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.
三、考研英语作文批改
批改:语法正确
批改:开头段表达不错,清晰地阐述了图画内容, 表达的主题和图画也是贴合的
批改:语法正确
批改:语法正确,表达也很好
批改:内容表达很好,也很具体
原文:strengthen
批改:including 是介词,后面要加动词的 ing 形式,改为 strengthening
批改:结尾段表达很好
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:17分/20分
题目要求:总体上来说是切题的,表明了个人观点,和图画的内容很贴合
语言表达:存在一处语法错误,词汇表达不错,一些句式也很好
结构逻辑:文章的结构完整清晰,内容也比较丰富具体
修改建议:语法问题结合作文批注仔细修改,要细心。之后可以多积累素材,自己多练练句子,进一步丰富自己的句式和观点储备,试着多用自己的话来写,总的来说写的不错,加油!
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