考研英语一2013年大作文真题与例文批改

2013年考研英语一大作文属于典型的图表作文，要求考生准确描述数据变化并深入解读现象。本文精解的这篇柱状图批改范例，完整覆盖考研英语一作文范文常考图表的描述思路，是考研英语图表类作文的标杆范例。

一、考研英语一2013年大作文题目

考研英语一2013年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly, 2) interpret its intended meaning, and3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2013年大作文批改例文

As shown in the cartoon, there are a number of graduates standing on the life way, which face vairous options with looking for jobs, continuing the study, going abroad, and making the business. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that it is option that play an important and positive role both in our personal lives and in society.

The phenomenon is thought-provoking in sereral ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, in modern society full of chances, changes, and challenges, the level of learning has become a key factor that distinguishes exceptional individuals from ordinary people, and its significance has become increasingly evident. What is more, looking for jobs holds exceptional significance for a nation, as it serve as a crucial cornerstone for boosting overall national strength, further prospelling social stability and sustainable development.

In brief, option is the catalyst for social and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice. Only by doing so can we fulfill our aspirations.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：shown in the cartoon, there are a number of graduates standing on the life way, which face vairous options with looking for jobs, continuing the study, going abroad, and making the business. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that it is option that play an important and positive role both in our personal lives and in society.

批改：第一段成功描述了漫画并点明了主题

原文：vairous o

批改：vairous -> various。注意拼写

原文： with looking for jobs,

批改：such as seeking employment, pursuing further studies, going abroad, or starting their own businesses。“with”用法不准确，用“such as”或“like”来列举更规范。“making the business”建议改为“starting a business”。

原文：t is option

批改：it is option that play -> it is **options** that **play**。主语“options”是复数，所以强调句的谓语动词“play”也需用复数形式。

原文：e phenomenon is thought-provoking in sereral ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, in modern society full of chances, changes, and challenges, the level of learning has become a key factor that distinguishes exceptional individuals from ordinary people, and its significance has become increasingly evident. What is more, looking for jobs holds exceptional significance for a nation, as it serve as a crucial cornerstone for boosting overall national strength, further prospelling social stability and sustainable development.

批改：你提到的“学习水平”和“找工作”都是具体的选择，但它们与段落主题句“选择的现象”（the phenomenon of options）之间的逻辑关系可以更紧密一些。可以稍作调整，说明“正是多样的选择，使得个人可以通过深造提升自己，同时就业市场的选择也支撑了国家发展”。

原文： sereral w

批改：sereral -> several。注意拼写

原文： it serve a

批改：it serve -> it serves。主语“it”是第三人称单数，谓语动词要用“serves”。

原文： prospelling

批改：prospelling -> propelling。注意拼写。

原文： brief, option is the catalyst for social and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice. Only by doing so can we fulfill our aspirations.

批改：结尾段总结了观点，并使用了“catalyst”这样的好词

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：15

这篇作文内容完整，结构清晰，但在语言运用的准确性和丰富性上仍有提升空间。

总评与修改建议：

这篇作文的进步在于结构非常完整，论述有层次，从个人到国家，思路很好。你也在有意识地使用一些高级词汇和句型，这是非常棒的尝试！

为了帮助你取得更大的进步，我提供三个具体的建议：

夯实语法基础：请特别关注主谓一致（如 options play, it serves）和非谓语动词（如 facing）这些核心语法点。它们是写作准确性的基石。

提升用词精度：在平时阅读中，多积累一些地道的搭配。比如，“就业”用 “employment” 或 “job market” 比 “looking for jobs” 更书面；“创业”用 “start a business” 或 “become an entrepreneur” 更准确。

强化逻辑纽带：在提出分论点时，可以有意识地用一两句话说明它如何支撑你的中心论点。例如，在论述“继续深造”前，可以加一句“多样的选择为个人成长提供了空间”（The availability of options provides room for personal growth），这样逻辑链条就更紧密了。

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