2014年考研英语二大作文属于典型的图表作文,要求考生准确描述数据变化并深入解读现象。本文精解的这篇柱状图批改范例,完整覆盖考研英语二大作文常考图表的描述思路,是考研英语图表类作文的标杆范例。
一、2014年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2014年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and2) give your comments.You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET.
二、2014年考研英语二大作文批改例文
This is a column chart, clearly illustrating the remarkable contrasts in china’s residents" of city and countruside from 1990 to 2010. During the year, the citizens of city showed an evident growth, from 300 to 666. By contrast, the people of countryside decreased sharply, from the peak of 834 to 674. such statistics, apparently, can be associated with the process of urbanization, but what resulted in the differences above? What exactly contribute to this phenomenon? It is a thought -provoking question. On the one hand, with the progress of science and technology, more high-rise buildings have been established, and the urbanisation process has accelerated on the other hand, many young people from rural areas have settled in cities for employment reasons, which has led to the loss of rural population and an increase in urban population
Based on this, I think this trend with continue. Based on this, I think this trend will continue. However, the large loss of rural population is not a positive phenomenon. We need to coordinate the development of cities and rural areas and pay attention to the role of agriculture in development.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:in china’s
批改:china’s:国家名首字母应大写 China’s
原文:residents" of city and countrusi
批改:residents" of city and countruside:所有格使用错误且拼写错误。应改为 residents in urban and rural areas。countruside 应为 countryside。
原文:the citizens of city
批改:the citizens of city / the people of countryside:表达不地道,应为 the urban population / the rural population。
原文:00 to 666.
批改:数据单位:同样,需要加上单位 million。
原文:hat exactly con
批改:What exactly contribute:主谓不一致,主语 What 是单数,谓语应用 contributes。
原文:thought -provoking
批改:thought -provoking:连字符多余,应为 thought-provoking
原文:is is a column chart, clearly illustrating the remarkable contrasts in china’s residents" of city and countruside from 1990 to 2010. During the year, the citizens of city showed an evident growth, from 300 to 666. By contrast, the people of countryside decreased sharply, from the peak of 834 to 674. such statistics, apparently, can be associated with the process of urbanization, but what resulted in the differences above? What exactly contribute to this phenomenon? It is a thought -provoking question
批改:你本段的结构非常出色!没有平铺直叙数据,而是通过描述对比、点明主题(城市化)、再用两个设问句自然引出下文的原因分析,这种写法非常高级,能瞬间抓住阅卷老师的注意力。核心问题在于数据表达的规范性和个别语法错误。
原文:On the one hand,
批改:本段最大的问题是结构粘连。On the one hand 和 on the other hand 是配套使用的关联词,中间应该用句号或分号断开,而不应只用逗号连接,导致一个句子过于冗长。
原文:o the loss of rur
批改:the loss of rural population:应为 a decrease in the rural population
原文:n the one hand, with the progress of science and technology, more high-rise buildings have been established, and the urbanisation process has accelerated on the other hand, many young people from rural areas have settled in cities for employment reasons, which has led to the loss of rural population and an increase in urban population
批改:你分析的两个原因——“城市建设”的推力和“就业机会”的拉力——是城镇化最核心的动因,选择得非常精准。这表明你对社会现象有很好的理解力。只是句式的处理可以更清晰,让两个论点并列关系更明确。
原文:will conti
批改:with continue:明显的笔误,应为 will continue。
原文:Based on this, I think this trend with continue. Based o
批改:开头两句 Based on this... 是完全的重复,应删除一句。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:11分
这篇作文的框架设计、论证深度和思想高度都值得点赞。摆脱了模板化的写作,展现了自己的思考,
语言的规范:请务必在完稿后,专项检查数据单位(million)、国家名首字母大写、主谓一致这几个“
句式的干净利落:确保每个句子的结构都是清晰、独立的。避免长句杂糅,适时用句号断句。
优化衔接:让结论段的过渡更自然,例如使用 “While this trend is likely to continue, we must be aware of its potential drawbacks...” 来引出你的批判性观点。
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