一篇高分的考研英语大作文,常常具备结构清晰、句式多变、词汇地道三大特点。本文精解的2013年考研英语二批改范例,每一段都体现了这三大要素,启航教育考研英语二写作冲刺教研组对该范文进行了详细的亮点标注。
一、2013年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2013年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2013年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The bar chart clearly displays the changes in part-time job situation among university students. In the freshman year, the percentage of students of part-time was 67.77%, but by junior year, this rate had gradually risen to 71.93%. In contrast, the proportion of students of part-time experience a significant increase of 16.31% from the junior year to senior year.
The core reasons for observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. First and foremost, as the conductor playing a movement of changes, Our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound cooperation between university and enterprises polices, enabling university students have a ample opportunities to find suitable part-time jobs What is more, as the saying goes, on life"s stage,pressure is always present. Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense financial pressure, therefore, taking part-time jobs has emerged as their significant choose for utilizing leisure time. Considering these factors, the describe phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends? I am confident that the percentage of university students part-time jobs will likely steadily increase following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
批改:of改成taking
原文:of
批改:taking
批改:加jobs
批改:加jobs
原文:experience
批改:变成过去式experienced
原文:The bar chart clearly displays the changes in part-time job situation among university students. In the freshman year, the percentage of students of part-time was 67.77%, but by junior year, this rate had gradually risen to 71.93%. In contrast, the proportion of students of part-time experience a significant increase of 16.31% from the junior year to senior year.
批改:能够清晰的描绘图表中展现的内容,内容完整,注意避免小的语言错误。
批改:加the表示特指
原文:Our
批改:逗号后的单词小写
原文:polices
批改:policies是不是应该放在cooperation后面
批改:加to,enable sb to do sth
原文:a
批改:后面的机会是复数,a去掉
批改:加句号结束
原文:choose
批改:改成名词choice
原文:describe
批改:described
原文:The core reasons for observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. First and foremost, as the conductor playing a movement of changes, Our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound cooperation between university and enterprises polices, enabling university students have a ample opportunities to find suitable part-time jobs What is more, as the saying goes, on life"s stage,pressure is always present. Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense financial pressure, therefore, taking part-time jobs has emerged as their significant choose for utilizing leisure time. Considering these factors, the describe phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:能够运用逻辑关系词对图表中的现象进行分析论述,注意避免小的语言错误。
批改:加taking
原文:following
批改:in the following decades
原文:What about future trends? I am confident that the percentage of university students part-time jobs will likely steadily increase following decades.
批改:分析并预测了未来的趋势,言简意赅。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:9/15
1)内容符合题目的要求,能够准确全面的描绘出图表中的内容。
2)词汇方面,注意冠词的恰当使用;句式方面,能够运用一些复杂句式,句型结构灵活多变,但是要注意句子结构的完整;
3)逻辑结构清晰完整,论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子,符合英语句子结构的要求。
4)修改建议:内容充分,语言逻辑清晰,值得表扬。一定要细心一些,注意避免以上小的细节问题。再接再厉。
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