本文将启航教育一对一批改过的2024年考研英语二高分范文进行公开呈现。批改老师对文中每一个失分细节进行了精确标注,对照考研英语作文批改热点话题与评分细则,你可以快速了解考研英语写作的提分方向。
一、2024年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the chart below. In your essay, you should1) describe and interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. Write your answer in about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2024年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The bar chart clearly depicts the survey the main gains of students in practice course in a university. Learned related knowledge takes the lead at 91.3%, followed by risen ability with his hands at 84.8%.. Additionally, factors such as felled relaxed and promoted team work ability are also considered, accounting for 54.4% and 32.6%,respectively.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized us follows. To start with, practice holds exceptional significance for a nation as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for safeguarding publics, health and shaping national morals, further propelling social stability and sustainable development. In addition, the labor practice brings numerous benefits to the growth of teenagers. Its core driving force stems form teenager"s desire to step out of their comfort zones, embrace a broader future, and gain recognition from others.
In my view. practice can ignite our creativity and nurture aur souls, and promote personal growth and self- fulfillment, thus making life rewarding and meaningful, rather than being self-consuming.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:wledge takes the lead at 91.3%, followed by risen ability with his hands at 84.8%.. Additionally, factors such as felled relaxed and promoted team work ability are also considered, accounting for 54.4% and 32.6%,respect
批改:depicts the survey the main gains-> 句式杂糅,可改为 depicts the main gains of students... based on a survey 或 presents the results of a survey on the main gains of students... practice course-> practice courses (可数名词常用复数) Learned related knowledge-> Acquiring relevant knowledge (动名词作主语更规范) risen ability with his hands-> improving practical skills (更地道、专业的表达) felled relaxed-> feeling relaxed (拼写和语法错误) promoted team work ability-> enhancing teamwork ability (动名词并列) ,respectively-> , respectively (逗号后需加空格)
原文:d related knowledge takes the lead at 91.3%, followed by risen ability with his hands at 84.8%.. Additionally, factors such as felled relaxed and promoted team work ability are also considered, accounting for 54.4% and 32.6%,respectively.
批改: 第一段成功引出了图表主题。
原文:ummarized us follows. To start with, practice holds exceptional significance for a nation as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for safeguarding publics, health and shaping national morals, further propelling social stability and sustainable development. In addition, the labor practice b
批改:summarized us follows-> summarized as follows (拼写错误) safeguarding publics, health-> safeguarding public health (术语错误) form-> from (拼写错误) teenager"s-> teenagers" (复数名词的所有格)
原文:s for the observed phenomenon can be summarized us follows. To start with, practice holds exceptional significance for a nation as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for safeguarding publics, health and shaping national morals, further propelling social stability and sustainable development. In addition, the labor practice brings numerous benefits to the growth of teenagers. Its core driving force stems form teenager"s desire to step out of their comfort zones, embrace a broader future, and gain recognition from others.
批改:本段的论述视角非常宏大,从国家社会层面和青少年个人成长层面分析,立意很高。特别是对青少年心理动机(走出舒适区、获得认可)的分析,很有见地。可以进一步提升的地方是让论证更聚焦于图表。第一个原因关于“国家”的论述略微有些宽泛,可以更直接地联系“大学实践课”如何培养人才,从而服务于国家发展。这样能让分析更切题。
原文: view. practice can ignit
批改:In my view.-> In my view, (标点错误,应使用逗号连接主句) aur-> our (拼写错误) self- fulfillment-> self-fulfillment (拼写错误)
原文:iew. practice can ignite our creativity and nurture aur souls, and promote personal growth and self- fulfillment, thus making life rewarding and meaningful, rather than being self-consuming.
批改:结尾段总结了实践课对个人的价值,使用了“ignite creativity”、“nurture our souls”等很好的表达
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:13
同学,你这篇作文最可贵的是具有宏大的论述视角和深刻的个人见解,这超越了简单的现象描述。当前,提升的关键在于表达的精准度和论证的聚焦性。
我为你总结两个最实用的建议:
夯实语言基础:请特别关注拼写、名词单复数和动名词的使用。完成作文后,留出几分钟专门检查这些细节,这是清晰表达的基础。
紧扣题目论证:在展开宏大论述时,可以时刻问自己:这一点是如何直接解释“大学实践课”带来的具体收获的?这能确保你深刻的思考始终围绕中心主题展开。
读懂范文只是第一步,写出高分作文才是关键。启航教育提供考研英语作文免费批改服务,由资深讲师逐句点评,让你清晰掌握考研英语作文批改写作锦囊的核心要点。2027考研英语备考,从一篇专业批改开始。
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