据启航教育英语教研组统计,考研英语写作模板话题连续多年成为考研英语二大作文的高频考点。本文带来的2021年考研英语二批改例文中,考生通过对社会热点的精准分析与地道表达,获得高分,其写作思路可供2027考研英语二考生直接借鉴。
一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The bar chart above provides a series of vital data, display the proportion of sport exercise methods among urban residents. First, it can be observed that 54.3% of people choose to self exercise. Second, 47.7% of people prefer choose exercise with friends. 23.9% of people choose to exercise with family members, Only 15.8% of people choose group exercise.
why should this situation take place? I think there are several factors that can explain it. First of all, I think more than half of people choose to exercise alone, they can choose exercise programs base on their own rhythm and hobby, while also get better the heart. Second, Some people choose exercise with friends or family members, I think they can exercise while promote each other"s emotions. Finally, the reason why there are few people choosing team exercise may be this way is not very helpful to oneself.
All in all, no matter what kind of exercise way. I deem the base on ours personal hobbies. At all, choose the wrong exercise method not noly fail to improve oneself, but also makes oneself upset.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:display
批改:displaying 用非谓语形式
原文:choose exercise
批改:exercising
原文:The bar chart above provides a series of vital data, display the proportion of sport exercise methods among urban residents. First, it can be observed that 54.3% of people choose to self exercise. Second, 47.7% of people prefer choose exercise with friends. 23.9% of people choose to exercise with family members, Only 15.8% of people choose group exercise.
批改:用具体数据描述图表内容,清晰直观,但是建议在段落后面补充这些数据反映的社会现象
原文: base
批改:based
原文:get
批改:getting
原文:the heart
批改:成分不明,建议删除
原文:choose
批改:choose to
原文:promote
批改:promoting
原文:why should this situation take place? I think there are several factors that can explain it. First of all, I think more than half of people choose to exercise alone, they can choose exercise programs base on their own rhythm and hobby, while also get better the heart. Second, Some people choose exercise with friends or family members, I think they can exercise while promote each other"s emotions. Finally, the reason why there are few people choosing team exercise may be this way is not very helpful to oneself.
批改:以分论点的形式论述这一现象背后的原因,逻辑严谨,层次分明。
原文: the base
批改:it should be based
原文:ours
批改:our
原文:choose
批改:choosing 动名词做主语
原文:fail
批改:fails
原文:All in all, no matter what kind of exercise way. I deem the base on ours personal hobbies. At all, choose the wrong exercise method not noly fail to improve oneself, but also makes oneself upset.
批改:总结全文,升华主题
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:11/15
这篇文章内容完整充实,结构清晰合理,逻辑严谨,层次分明,句型表达丰富。
语法:语言表达和语法基础上,进步的空间还很大。比如本次作文中出现多次的单词拼写错误等问题,会很拉低你的平均分。另外还需要注意一些基础的语法问题和表达搭配问题,有时间好好看看文中的批改,细心吸收,争取在接下来的练习中避免类似的错误。
首段总体概括图表主题,呈现各锻炼方式的占比数据,突出独自锻炼占比最高这一核心特征。第二段原因分析,可从现代生活节奏快、个人时间安排灵活、社交网络有限等角度展开。第三段可结合当前趋势,合理推测未来锻炼方式的发展方向,如独自锻炼可能持续流行,同时建议增加家庭和团体锻炼以促进社交与健康。
整体来看,主要是细节错误,大问题比较少,后续练习注重细节,继续加油!
复习考研英语大作文,务必要重视范文精读+专业批改的双向结合。启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班,专为冲刺阶段考生打造,从话题预测到写作模板一应俱全,是考研英语写作模板写作提分的可靠方案。
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