2013年考研英语二大作文失分点批改

2013年考研英语二大作文是启航考研英语备考清单中的必练题型。本文带来的高分批改范例，配套启航教育老师的逐句批注与预测话题标签，适合考研英语考生在冲刺阶段精读精练，是一套完整的写作提升资料。

一、2013年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2013年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2013年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The bar chart clearly depicts the situation of student"s part-time jobs at a certain university. In the freshman year, the percentage of students’ part-time jobs was 67.77%, but by the junior year, this rate had gradually risen to 71.93%. In contrast, the proporation of students" part-time jobs experienced a significant increase of 16.31% from the junior year to the senior year.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, an increasing number of young people especially who are experiencing the junior year to the senior year believe that in modern society full of changes, challenges, having employment experiences is indispensable if they wish to achieve success in the long run. In addition, Chinese society is undergoing an extensive and profound transformation. In my view, the fundamental reason for this phenomenon is the significant progress made by China"s part-time econmy in responding to these changes.Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about future trends? I"m confident that the proporation of university students taking part-time jobs will steadily increase in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：student"s

批改：可数名词单数形式不能单独存在，改为 students"

批改：语法正确

批改：开头段表达不错，清晰地阐述了图表内容

批改：语法正确

批改：语法正确

原文：people

批改：加逗号

原文：especially who

批改：especially 作为副词，不能直接连接一个以 who 引导的定语从句，who 前面要加上一个被修饰的名词，即 especially those who

原文：year

批改：加逗号

原文：employment experiences

批改：改为 work experience 是正确自然的表达

原文：econmy

批改：economy

批改：内容表达很好，也很具体

批改：语法正确，结尾段表达也很好

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：11分/ 15分

题目要求：总体上来说是切题的，表明的个人观点与图表的内容是贴合的

语言表达：存在几处语法和拼写问题，词汇表达不错，一些句式表达也很好

结构逻辑：文章的结构完整清晰，内容也比较丰富具体

修改建议：1. 语法问题结合作文批注仔细修改 2. 拼写要细心。之后可以多积累素材，自己多练练句子，进一步丰富自己的句式和观点储备，提高自己的语言表达，试着多用自己的话来写，总的来说写的不错，加油！

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