2013年考研英语一大作文是启航考研英语备考清单中的必练题型。本文带来的高分批改范例,配套启航教育老师的逐句批注与预测话题标签,适合考研英语考生在冲刺阶段精读精练,是一套完整的写作提升资料。
一、考研英语一2013年大作文题目
考研英语一2013年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly, 2) interpret its intended meaning, and3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2013年大作文批改例文
As shown in the cartoon, there are many graduates, standing at the crossroads of life and facing four different choices, which are finding job, taking part in pastgraduate examination, going abroad and starting a business. Evidently, the cartoons intends to convey to readers that it is choosing a suitable way plays an important and positive role both in our lives and in society.
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particulary significant. On the one hand, in modern society full of changes, chances, and challenges, choosing a suitable way and persevering with it has become a key factor that distinguishes expertional individuals from ordinary people, and its significant has become increasingly evident. One the other hand, choosing a unsuitable way is like a heavy chain that hinders children"s progress, depriving them of the ability to think independently and preventing them from shining in future society.
In brief, choosing a suitable way is a catalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice. Only by doing so can we develop individual potential, fulfill our aspirations, create a happier life and build a more harmonious society.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:cartoons
批改:单数
原文:way
批改:强调句结构里缺少that
原文:As shown in the cartoon, there are many graduates, standing at the crossroads of life and facing four different choices, which are finding job, taking part in pastgraduate examination, going abroad and starting a business. Evidently, the cartoons intends to convey to readers that it is choosing a suitable way plays an important and positive role both in our lives and in society.
批改:能够完整全面的描述出图画中的现象,并能够直接点明作文的主题。
原文:particulary
批改:particularly
原文:expertional
批改:exceptional
原文:significant
批改:改成名词
原文:One
批改:On
原文:This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particulary significant. On the one hand, in modern society full of changes, chances, and challenges, choosing a suitable way and persevering with it has become a key factor that distinguishes expertional individuals from ordinary people, and its significant has become increasingly evident. One the other hand, choosing a unsuitable way is like a heavy chain that hinders children"s progress, depriving them of the ability to think independently and preventing them from shining in future society.
批改:能够通过正反两方面进行论述来突出论点,能够运用逻辑关系词,使得句子之间衔接较为连贯。
原文:In brief, choosing a suitable way is a catalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice. Only by doing so can we develop individual potential, fulfill our aspirations, create a happier life and build a more harmonious society.
批改:能够提出自己的建议,起到了总结和再次呼应主题的作用。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:15/20
内容切题,全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面,注意避免拼写错误以及正确使用词性;句式方面,注意强调句句子结构的完整;语法方面,语法基础还不错。逻辑结构清晰完整,论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子,结构清晰。
修改建议:可以看出作文完成的非常认真,无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰,值得表扬。如果能够再注意避免以上的一些小的细节问题会更好。继续加油。
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