考研英语一2016年大作文失分点批改

据启航教育英语教研组统计，考研英语作文批改话题连续多年成为考研英语一大作文的高频考点。本文带来的2016年考研英语一批改例文中，考生通过对社会热点的精准分析与地道表达，获得高分，其写作思路可供2027考研英语一考生直接借鉴。

一、考研英语一2016年大作文题目

考研英语一2016年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following pictures. In your essay, you should1) describe the pictures briefly, 2) interpret the meaning, and3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2016年大作文批改例文

In the left-hand cartoon, there is a father, watching TV, smoking a cigarette and saying that his son should study hard. On the contrary, in the right-hand portrayal, the father and the son are studying hard together. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that postive examples are the brush that paints a brightly future, while negative examples are the shackle that hinders progress for children.

This phenomenon is the thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, postive examples can ignite children" s creativity, and promote personal growth and self-fulfillment, thus making life rewarding and meaning, rather than being joyless. On the other hand, negative examples is like a heavy chain that hinders children" s progress, leaving them with a negative outlook on life and preventing them from shining brightly in future society.

In brief, postive examples are the catalyst for society and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should activity support and advocate this practice; additionally, we must be actuely aware of the detrimental effects of negative examples to ensure our growth stays on course.

三、考研英语作文批改

批改：语法正确

批改：语法正确

原文：brightly

批改：形容词修饰名词，此处为 bright

批改：开头段表达不错，清晰地阐述了图画内容, 表达的主题和图画也是贴合的

批改：语法正确

原文：meaning

批改：此处为形容词，改为 meaningful

原文：is

批改：名词复数作主语，此处动词不用三单形式，改为 are

原文：a heavy chain that hinders

批改：建议 heavy chains that hinder 与主语的复数形式相搭配

批改：内容表达很好，也很具体

原文：society

批改：此处为形容词，改为 social

批改：结尾段内容表达也很好

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：16分/20分

题目要求：总体上来说是切题的，表明了个人观点，和图画的内容很贴合

语言表达：存在几处语法问题，词汇表达不错，一些句式也很好

结构逻辑：文章的结构完整清晰，内容也比较丰富具体

修改建议：语法问题结合作文批注仔细修改，要细心。之后可以多积累素材，自己多练练句子，进一步丰富自己的句式和观点储备，提高自己的语言表达，试着多用自己的话来写，总的来说写的不错，加油！

复习考研英语大作文，务必要重视范文精读+专业批改的双向结合。启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班，专为冲刺阶段考生打造，从话题预测到写作模板一应俱全，是考研英语作文批改写作提分的可靠方案。