启航教育考研英语教研组精心筛选了2016年考研英语二大作文真题原文及高分批改范例。本篇范文中,老师对每一句都给出修改建议,是考研英语二作文范文备考资料库中的精品,特别推荐给参加2027考研的学子。
一、考研英语二2016年大作文题目
考研英语二2016年大作文Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and2) give your comments.You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET.
二、考研英语二2016年大作文批改例文
The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of the travelling purpose among students at a certain university. Enjoying view takes the lead at 37%, followed by relieving stress at 33%. Additionally, factors such as developing friendship, cultivating independent ability and others are also considered, accounting for 9%, 6%, and 15%, respectively.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people are no longer content with mere material satis faction; they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why many students choose travelling to enjoy view in their free time. In addition, as the saying goes, "On life"s stage, pressure is always present." Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense academic pressure, and as a result, travelling has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of students, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of the travelling purpose among students at a certain university.
批改:开篇直接点明图表类型和主题,清晰明了
原文:Enjoying view takes the lead at 37%, followed by relieving stress at 33%.
批改:准确描述了图表中占比前两位的旅游目的及相应比例,数据引用准确。
原文:Additionally, factors such as developing friendship, cultivating independent ability and others are also considered, accounting for 9%, 6%, and 15%, respectively.
批改:完整地列出了其他旅游目的及占比,“respectively”使用准确,使数据对应关系清晰。
原文:The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.
批改:引出下文对原因的分析,起到承上启下的过渡作用。
原文:To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people are no longer content with mere material satis faction; they also pursue spiritual enjoyment.
批改:从社会发展的角度分析学生旅游目的的原因,逻辑合理,表达清晰。
原文:This explains why many students choose travelling to enjoy view in their free time.
批改:承接上文,进一步阐述原因与现象的联系
原文:In addition, as the saying goes, "On life"s stage, pressure is always present."
批改:引用俗语增加文章的文化底蕴和说服力,同时自然地引出下一个原因。
原文:Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense academic pressure, and as a result, travelling has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time.
批改:准确指出大学生面临学业压力,进而选择旅游来利用闲暇时间,逻辑连贯。
原文:Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:总结前文原因,得出图表现象合理的结论,使段落结构完整。
原文:What about future trends?
批改:通过提问引出对未来趋势的讨论,自然流畅。
原文:I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of students, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
批改:表达了对图表数据准确性的信心,并预测未来趋势会相对稳定,有一定的深度和前瞻性。
原文:The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of the travelling purpose among students at a certain university. Enjoying view takes the lead at 37%, followed by relieving stress at 33%. Additionally, factors such as developing friendship, cultivating independent ability and others are also considered, accounting for 9%, 6%, and 15%, respectively
批改:整体较好地完成了对图表的描述,数据引用准确
原文:The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people are no longer content with mere material satis faction; they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why many students choose travelling to enjoy view in their free time. In addition, as the saying goes, "On life"s stage, pressure is always present." Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense academic pressure, and as a result, travelling has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising
批改:对图表现象的原因分析较为合理,逻辑清晰,使用了过渡句使段落层次分明。
原文:What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of students, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades
批改:引出未来趋势讨论自然,对未来趋势的预测有一定见解
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:12/15
题目要求:文章紧扣题目要求展开写作。开篇对图表进行了清晰的解读,准确阐述了不同旅游目的在大学生群体中的占比情况。在评论部分,深入分析了学生选择不同旅游目的背后的原因,并对未来趋势做出了合理预测,完整地涵盖了题目中“解读图表”和“给出评论”两大核心要求。
语言表达:句式有一定多样性,包含了简单句、复合句等。例如在阐述原因时,使用了“To start with... In addition...”的结构,层次清晰地罗列观点,增强了文章的逻辑性和连贯性。同时,引用俗语“On life"s stage, pressure is always present.”也为文章增添了文化色彩。
内容层面:从社会发展和学生自身压力两个主要方面深入分析了学生选择不同旅游目的的原因,逻辑合理,具有较强的说服力。例如指出社会发展使人们追求精神享受,所以很多学生选择旅游欣赏风景;学业压力大,旅游成为他们利用闲暇时间的重要方式。
修改建议:加强词汇学习,注重词汇的准确性和恰当性,可以通过阅读优秀范文、积累词汇用法等方式提高;同时,多进行句子结构和表达方式的练习,使语句更加自然流畅,增强文章的可读性。
考研英语二作文范文写作提分高效的方式,是让经验丰富的老师亲自批改你的作文。启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班,主讲斌哥亲批每一份学员作业,真题作业批改、轻松应对各种复杂题目,让考研英语写作更有底。
【28考研辅导课程推荐】:28考研集训课程,VIP领学计划,28考研VIP全科定制套餐(公共课VIP+专业课1对1) , 这些课程中都会配有内部讲义以及辅导书和资料,同时会有教研教辅双师模式对大家进行教学以及督学,并配有24小时答疑和模拟测试等,可直接咨询在线客服老师领取大额优惠券。
热门下载
资料下载
院校解析
真题解析
考研数学
考研英语
考研政治
考研备考