考研英语一2011年大作文怎么写？附例文批改

正在备考考研英语的你，是否还在为2011年考研英语一大作文的写法犯愁？本文精选一篇高分组同学的批改例文，系统梳理考研英语作文话题的常考话题与写作框架。透过启航教育老师的逐段点评，你能直观感受高分作文的得分诀窍。

一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目

考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文

As shown in the cartoon，there are two tourists sitting on ship and throwing rubbishes to river，which they enjoy process of travel。Evidently，the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that ethic of protecting environment is an issue that requires both in our personal Iives and in society。

This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways ，but two of them are particularly significant。First and foremost，lack of ethic can harm relationships ，erode trust and respect，and cause the loss of opportunities and resources 。It can also damage personal image reputation,leading to exclusion and failure in work and social situations。What is more ，protecting environment holds exceptional significance for a nation，as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for shaping national morals，further propelling social stability and sustainable development。

How can we put an end to the problem of harming environment。It is suggested by many that we need a package deal，including issuing related regulations and enhancing supervision 。But would these measures be comprehensive enough？In reality,we also need to strengthen moral education。With the support of these measures ,we can effectively tackle the issue at its core。

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：rubbishes

批改：垃圾不可数

原文：they enjoy process of travel

批改：应该是这污染了河流，改成：which pollutes the river

批改：加attention

原文：As shown in the cartoon，there are two tourists sitting on ship and throwing rubbishes to river，which they enjoy process of travel。Evidently，the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that ethic of protecting environment is an issue that requires both in our personal Iives and in society。

批改：能够完整全面的描述出图画中的现象，并能够直接点明作文的主题。

批改：加and

原文：This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways ，but two of them are particularly significant。First and foremost，lack of ethic can harm relationships ，erode trust and respect，and cause the loss of opportunities and resources 。It can also damage personal image reputation,leading to exclusion and failure in work and social situations。What is more ，protecting environment holds exceptional significance for a nation，as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for shaping national morals，further propelling social stability and sustainable development。

批改：该段落能够将图画背后蕴含的真实意义加以阐述，语言衔接连贯。能够运用逻辑关系词来连接句子，值得表扬。

原文：。

批改：问号

原文：ow can we put an end to the problem of harming environment。It is suggested by many that we need a package deal，including issuing related regulations and enhancing supervision 。But would these measures be comprehensive enough？In reality,we also need to strengthen moral education。With the support of these measures ,we can effectively tackle the issue at its core。

批改：该段再次总结强调写作的中心，起到了点题的作用。言简意赅，无语言错误。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：15/20

内容切题，准确全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面，注意单词的可数与不可数；句式方面，注意句子结构和成分的完整；语法方面，注意定语从句的正确使用。逻辑结构清晰完整，论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子，结构清晰。

修改建议：可以看出作文完成的很认真，无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰，值得表扬。如果能够再注意避免以上的一些小的细节性错误会更好。继续加油。

启航教育始终专注考研英语教研，每年定期整理发布最新的考研英语作文话题真题范文与高分预测。完成本文精读后，可在线咨询获取更多考研英语一写作话题素材。预约免费批改，更有专业老师为你诊断写作中的隐形失分点。