考研英语一2011年大作文怎么写？附例文批改

正在备考考研英语的你，是否还在为2011年考研英语一大作文的写法犯愁？本文精选一篇高分组同学的批改例文，系统梳理考研英语作文万能句型的常考话题与写作框架。透过启航教育老师的逐段点评，你能直观感受高分作文的得分诀窍。

一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目

考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文

As shown in the cartoon, there are two people enjoying the scenery and throwing rubbish into the river, without keeping the environment clean. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environmental protection is an issue that requires great attention both in our person lives and in society.

The phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, while certain Chinese traditions may be outdated, the virtue of environmental protection is one that should never lose its luster, as it is an essential bond that keeps the Chinese nation thriving. On the other hand, although the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon, its root cause lies in the fact that some individuals, in their pursuit of individual convinence, have disregared the virtue of environmental protection.

How can we put an end to the problem of environment? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including enhancing supervision and issuing related laws. But would these measures by comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to help students cultivate more rational values. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：As shown in the cartoon, there are two people enjoying the scenery and throwing rubbish into the river, without keeping the environment clean.

批改：对漫画内容进行了简单直接的描述，能大致了解画面场景

原文：Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environmental protection is an issue that requires great attention both in our person lives and in society.

批改：准确指出了漫画的意图，语句通顺，但 “person lives” 表述有误，应为 “personal lives”。

原文：The phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant.

批改：起到承上启下的过渡作用，引出下文对现象原因的分析，逻辑清晰。

原文：On the one hand, while certain Chinese traditions may be outdated, the virtue of environmental protection is one that should never lose its luster, as it is an essential bond that keeps the Chinese nation thriving.

批改：阐述了一个重要观点，将环保美德与中国发展相联系，有一定深度

原文：On the other hand, although the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon, its root cause lies in the fact that some individuals, in their pursuit of individual convinence, have disregared the virtue of environmental protection.

批改：从规则和个人行为角度分析现象原因，逻辑合理，但 “individual convinence” 拼写错误，应为 “individual convenience”。

原文：How can we put an end to the problem of environment?

批改：提出如何解决环境问题，自然引出下文的解决措施

原文：It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including enhancing supervision and issuing related laws.

批改：提出了部分解决措施，语句通顺。

原文：But would these measures by comprehensive enough?

批改：对前面提出的措施提出质疑，引发进一步思考，但 “by” 用词错误，应为 “be”。

原文：In reality, we also need to help students cultivate more rational values. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue.

批改：补充了解决环境问题的另一重要措施，即培养学生理性价值观，整体逻辑连贯。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：11/20

题目要求：文章按照题目要求，完成了对漫画的描述、意图解释以及个人评论三部分内容。开篇描述漫画中两人赏景却乱扔垃圾的场景，接着指出漫画意在强调环保需高度重视，最后分析了现象原因并提出解决措施，整体结构符合题目框架。

语言表达：整体上文章的语句较为流畅，没有出现明显的语句断裂或表意不清的情况，使用了“On the one hand”“On the other hand”“But”等过渡词和短语，使文章在阐述不同观点和内容时，衔接较为自然，逻辑层次相对清晰。

内容层面：始终围绕环保这一主题展开论述，从漫画描述到原因分析再到解决措施，都紧扣环保问题，没有出现偏离主题的情况。

修改建议：加强对语法知识的学习和运用，确保句子的时态、语态、主谓一致等语法要素正确无误。例如，将“the problem of environment”改为“the environmental problem”。替换不准确的用词，使表达更加精准。如将“package deal”改为“comprehensive measures”。

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