考研英语一2016年大作文怎么写？附例文批改

面对2016年考研英语一大作文，许多同学最关心的是有没有可复制的写作模板。本文带来的高分范文严格遵循启航考研英语高分框架，从开头引入、主体论证到结尾呼应，全文清晰流畅，是考研英语考生的必备学习资料。

一、考研英语一2016年大作文题目

考研英语一2016年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following pictures. In your essay, you should1) describe the pictures briefly, 2) interpret the meaning, and3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2016年大作文批改例文

In the left-hand cartoon, there is a father watching TV and smoking, when telling his kids to study hard. On the contrary, in the right-hand cartoon, the father and his kids are all working in their studies. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that well examples are the brush that paints a bright future, while bed examples are the shackle that hinders progress.

This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particulary significant. On the one hand, while certain Chinese traditions may be out dated, the good leading is one that should never lose its luster, as it is an essential bond that keeps the Chinese nation thriving. On the ather hand, bed examples which come from parents are like a heavy chain that hinders children’s progress, leaving them with a negative outlook on life and preventing them from shining brightly in future society.

In brief, good examples are the catalyst for children"s development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate the practice; additionally, we must be acutely aware of detrimental effects of bed examples to ensure children"s grobith stays on couse.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：when

批改：改为 while 更合适，表伴随

原文：in

批改：改为 on, "work in" 后面通常接一个领域或地点，"Studies"（学业、研究）作为一个活动，通常与介词 "on" 搭配。

原文：well

批改：改为 good, well 常表示的是身体好或者状态好

原文：bed

批改：bad

批改：开头段表达不错，清晰地阐述了图画内容, 表达的主题和图画也是贴合的

批改：语法正确

批改：内容表达很好，也很具体

原文：bed

批改：bad

原文：grobith

批改：growth

原文：couse

批改：course

原文：bed

批改：bad

批改：结尾段内容表达很好

原文：the good leading

批改：此处的表达不符合英文习惯，改为 setting a good example

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：15分/20分

题目要求：总体上来说是切题的，表明了个人观点，和图画的内容很贴合

语言表达：存在几处语法和拼写问题，词汇表达不错，一些句式也很好

结构逻辑：文章的结构完整清晰，内容也比较丰富具体

修改建议：1. 语法问题结合作文批注仔细修改 2. 拼写要细心 3. 全文的主题词最好保持一致。之后可以多积累素材，自己多练练句子，进一步丰富自己的句式和观点储备，提高自己的表达，总的来说写的不错，加油！

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