2021年考研英语二大作文怎么写？附例文批改

考研英语作文批改命题趋势越来越关注社会热点与考生思辨能力。本文带来的2021年考研英语二批改范例，透过图表/图画深挖现象背后的本质，由启航教育老师逐段精批，可帮助考生建立稳定的考研英语写作思维框架。

一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The bar chart cleany depicts the percentage of breakdown of the different ways of physical exercise among residents, in certain city.Exercising alone takes the lead at 54.3%,followed by exercising with friends at 47.7%.Additionally, factos such as exercising with family , collective activity are also considered, accounting for 23.9%, and 15.8%, respectively.

The core reasons for the the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows, To start with, the younger generation, particularly those born in the 1990s and 2000s, are accustomed to living alone in big cities. Therefore, the proportion of exercising who exerise alone is the highest. In addition, as the conductor orchestrating of the symphony of changes, our government has made tremerdous efforts to build many football fields, basketball courts and parks, enading residents to exercise with friends and family. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about future trends ? I confidene that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of residents, serving as a microcasm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：leany depicts the percentage of breakdown of the different ways of physical exercise among residents, in certain city.

批改：leany 应拼写为 clearly。the percentage of breakdown 地道的表达是 the percentage breakdown 或 the breakdown of percentages。 ...among residents, in certain city.：标点使用不当（逗号多余）和冠词缺失。应改为 among residents in a certain city.。

原文： factos

批改：factos 应为 factors

原文：collective activity

批改：“collective activity” 应为 “collective activities”（与前文 “different ways” 保持复数一致，表达 “集体运动” 这一类方式）

批改：本段成功引入了图表的核心数据，信息点完整。但存在多处拼写、语法和标点错误，影响了开篇的专业性和流畅度。

原文：the

批改：删去

原文：xercising who exerise alone i

批改：应改为 the proportion of people who exercise alone。exerise 拼写错误，应为 exercise

原文： tremerdous efforts to build many football fields, basketball courts and parks, enading

批改：拼写错误，tremerdous 应为 tremendous。 拼写错误，enading 应为 enabling。

原文：of

批改：删去

批改：该段完成 “分析现象原因” 的核心任务，从 “独立生活方式” 和 “政府支持” 两方面展开，方向贴合实际。但存在拼写错误、标点错误、和语法混乱的问题

原文：confidene

批改：confidene 应为 am confident

原文：microcasm

批改：microcasm 应为 microcosm

原文：s.

批改：本段功能完整，但对未来的预测与之前的分析衔接不够紧密，且存在拼写问题。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：10/15分

本文结构完整，基本完成了图表描述的任务。然而，文章在多个方面有提升空间。最突出的问题在于全文出现了拼写、语法和标点错误，这影响了文章的准确性和可读性。在内容层面，整体思路不错，原因分析段的论证逻辑可以更严谨，跳脱模版思维。建议在后续的学习中，优先巩固词汇拼写和基本句法等语言基本功，这是提升写作成绩的基石。同时，在论述时，注意让每一个理由都紧密服务于对图表核心现象的解释。加油~

关于2021年考研英语二大作文，如果你还有其他疑问，或是想进一步研读考研英语作文批改高分范文，欢迎在线咨询启航教育的答疑老师。同时报名2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班，即可加入考研英语研友社群，开启冲刺伴学。