考研英语一2024年大作文实例分析与批改

备战2024年考研英语大作文，先从研读经典高分范文开始。本文汇集的启航教育批改范文中，不仅有原文、批注，还有词汇注释与亮点解析。准备2027考研的同学，可联系启航教育在线咨询考研英语一写作高分规划。

一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目

考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文

In the lefe-hand cartoon, a young man, standing in the park fitness area and saying, "The newly renovated park near my home is really nice!" Simultaneously, in the right-hand bar chart, the nunber of parks in a certain city experienced a significant increase of 264 from 2020 to 2022.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphing of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build many park, enabling citizens to have ample opportunities to exercise. In addition, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people"s attitudes towards of exercise have undergone significant changes. This explains why an increasing number of people choose exercise in the park, rather than being couch potatoes. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about future trends? I am confident that the number of parks will steadily increase in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文： the lefe-hand cartoon, a young man, standing in the park fitness area and saying, "The newly renovated park near my home is really nice!" Simultaneously, in the right-hand bar chart, the nunber of parks in a certain city experienced a significant increase of 264 from 2020 to 2022.

批改：本段准确抓住了漫画与图表的核心信息，关联性明确

原文：efe-hand cartoon, a young man, standing in the park fitness area and saying, "The newly renovated p

批改：lefe-hand：拼写错误，应为 left-hand。 a young man, standing... and saying...：此句缺少谓语动词，建议改为 a young man is standing... and saying... 或 a young man stands... and says...

原文：unber of

批改：nunber：拼写错误，应为 number。

原文：core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphing of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build many park, enabling citizens to have ample opportunities to exercise. In addition, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people"s attitudes towards of exercise have undergone significant changes. This explains why an increasing number of people choose exercise in the park, rather than being couch potatoes. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

批改：论证部分从政府角色和公众观念两个角度切入，结构清晰。

原文：ymphing of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build many park,

批改：symphing：拼写错误，应为 symphony。但 "orchestrating the symphony of changes" 这个比喻非常新颖且精彩！ build many park：名词单复数错误，应为 build many parks。

原文：itudes towards of e

批改：attitudes towards of exercise：介词重复，应去掉 of，改为 attitudes towards exercise

原文：at about future trends? I am confident that the number of parks will steadily increase in the following decades.

批改：结尾段顺利完成了预测未来的任务，行文流畅

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：15

总评与修改建议

你的作文拥有清晰的“描述-分析-预测”结构，并且能准确地将漫画寓意与图表数据联系起来，这体现了你良好的审题和构思能力。文中不时闪现的亮点，如“orchestrating the symphony of changes”和“couch potatoes”，也证明了你具备运用高级词汇和地道表达的潜力。

当前，影响作文得分的主要因素是文中反复出现的一些基础性拼写和语法错误。建议你可以建立一个自己的“个人易错词清单”，将经常拼错的词（如number, left, symphony）和语法点（如动词不定式、介词搭配）记录下来，并在写作后留出几分钟专门检查。当你解决了这些“小麻烦”后，你清晰的逻辑和出色的语感一定能让你在写作中更加得心应手。

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