本文精选了一篇得分13分以上的2024年考研英语一大作文高分范例,并附启航老师对该范文的逐句批改。文中清晰展示了考研英语写作技巧评分细则中关于语法多样性、词汇丰富度与逻辑连贯性的得分技巧,是考研英语学习的高价值内容。
一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目
考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文
The picture depicts a lively scene in a public fitness area, where citizens are enjoying their leisure time, and one person praises the newly-built small park nearby. Meanwhile, the bar chart shows the number of parks in a certain city rising steadily from 406 in 2020 to 532 in 2021 and 670 in 2022.
The implicit meaning behind these visuals is profound. The growing number of parks reflects the city’s efforts to improve public well-being and quality of life. Urban green spaces are not only places for physical exercise and relaxation but also an important part of building a livable city.
From my perspective, the expansion of urban parks is a praiseworthy trend. On one hand, local governments should continue to increase investment in public green spaces to meet citizens’ growing demand for a better life. On the other hand, we should also cherish these public resources and maintain the environment of parks.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:re depicts a lively scene in a public fitness area, where citizens are enjoying their leisure time, and one person praises the newly-built small park nearby. Meanwhile, the bar chart shows the number of parks in a certain city rising steadily from 406 in 2020 to 532 in 2021 and 670 in 2022.
批改:完美地完成了对两幅图的描述任务。语言简洁、准确、专业,数据引入清晰
原文:e city’s efforts to improve public well-being and quality of life. Urban green spaces are not only places for physical exercise and relaxation but also an important part of building a livable city.
批改:这一段是文章的“灵魂”,你准确地挖掘并阐述了现象背后的意义。逻辑清晰,从“反映政府努力”到“阐述公园双重作用”,层层递进,体现了很强的思辨能力。词汇和句式的运用都非常出色。
原文:spective, the expansion of urban parks is a praiseworthy trend. On one hand, local governments should continue to increase investment in public green spaces to meet citizens’ growing demand for a better life. On the other hand, we should also cherish these public resources and maintain the environment of
批改:结尾段提出了个人观点和建议,结构非常完整
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:17
内容要点:全面覆盖,阐释深刻。
语法结构与词汇:语法错误为零,词汇丰富且运用准确(如well-being, livable)。
语言流畅度与衔接:语言自然流畅,有效使用了多种衔接方法(如Meanwhile, not only... but also..., On one hand... On the other hand...),逻辑清晰。
第二段在阐述公园作用时,除了important part,是否可以考虑用integral component(不可或缺的组成部分)或cornerstone(基石)来增加变化?但这已经是更高的要求了。
本文精解的2024年考研英语一范文,在启航教育AI智能批改系统中拿到了高分评价。快速揪出失分点,对着薄弱点学提升更快,是考研英语写作技巧备考的贴心帮手。扫码预约,免费体验考研英语作文AI智能批改。
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