考研英语一2024年大作文实例分析与批改

想在考研英语一大作文中写出有深度的论证段落？本文精解的2024年考研英语一真题范文，从论据选择、过渡句使用到结尾点题都极具参考价值。启航教育考研英语教研组对该篇范文的批注，有助于考生建立完善的写作逻辑。

一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目

考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文

The drawing on the left side provides us with a lively scene; several urban residents are exercising in a park. A youngster says the new park is fantastic. Reterring to the statistics prouided in the right chart, the number of parks in a certain city had remarkably increased from 406 in 2020 to 670 in 2022. The purpose of the drawing and the chart seem to remind us that great accomplishments have been made in the construction of public facilities by the government.

ou s

There exist plenty of causes accouting for the phenomenon ur in various aspects. For instance, my hometown, a beautiful city, is commited to infrastructure construction. During the period, citzen satisfaction has improved. Furthermore, a rising number of individuals are coming to the realization that a healthy lifestyle is strongly dependent on infrastructure development. In the end, if the government ignored the importance of infrastracture development our cities would be confronted with an unpromising and fruitless future.

)ints

It is not difficalt to draw the conclusion that enough attention has been turned to the infrastructure by the departments concerned. For one thing, it is imperative for the authorities to increase investment contionuously, For another, mass media, such as radios, televisions. newspapers and the Internet. should appeal to people to live a healthy life. In this way, hopefully, we may have a better future.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：g in a park. A youngster says the new park is fantastic. Reterring to the statistics prouided in the right chart, the number of parks in a certain city had remarkably increased from 406 in 2020 to 670 in 2022. The purpose of the drawing and the chart seem to remind us that great accomplishments have been made in the construction of public facilities by the government.

批改：你的开篇很好地结合了图画与图表，并提炼出了核心主旨

原文：eterring to the statistics prouided in the right chart, the number of parks in a certain city had remarkably increased from 406 in 2020 to 670 in 2022. The purpose of the drawing and th

批改："Reterring" 拼写错误，应为 "Referring"。 "prouided" 拼写错误，应为 "provided"。 "had remarkably increased" 时态使用不当，描述过去具体时间段的变化应用一般过去时 "increased" 或 "rose"。 "the purpose... seem" 主谓不一致，主语 "purpose" 是单数，应为 "seems"。

原文：rthermore, a rising number of individuals are coming to the realization that a healthy lifestyle is strongly dependent on infrastructure development. In the end, if the government ignored the importance of infrastracture development our cities would be confronted with an unpromising and fruitless future.

批改：你从具体案例、市民感受和反面论证等多个角度分析原因，论证层次丰富，体现了较强的思辨能力。

原文：ccouting for the phenomenon ur in various aspects. For instance, my hometown, a beautiful city, is commited to infrastructure construction. During the period, citzen satisfaction has improved. Furthermore, a rising number of individuals are coming to the realization that a healthy lifestyle i

批改：accouting" 拼写错误，应为 "accounting"。 "ur" 为冗余输入，应删除。 "commited" 拼写错误，应为 "committed"。 "citzen" 拼写错误，应为 "citizen"。 "infrastracture" 拼写错误，应为 "infrastructure"。

原文：ase investment contionuously, For another, mass media, such as radios, televisions. newspapers and the Internet. should appeal to people to live a healthy life. In this way, hopefully, we may have a better future

批改：结尾段总结了观点并提出了具体建议，结构完整。

原文：difficalt to draw the conclusion that enough attention has been turned to the infrastructure by the departments concerned. For one thing, it is imperative for the authorities to increase invest

批改："difficalt" 拼写错误，应为 "difficult"。 "contionuously" 拼写错误，应为 "continuously"。 标点使用错误："televisions. newspapers" 应改为 "televisions, newspapers"。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：15

总评：

你的作文展现了清晰的逻辑结构、多角度的论证能力以及成熟的句式运用，这非常值得肯定。当前，影响你获得更高分数的主要因素是拼写错误和个别语法细节。这些“小瑕疵”在一定程度上影响了你优秀思想的完美表达。

修改建议

你的作文框架和思辨深度都已相当出色。下一步，建议你将提升的重点放在“语言的精确性”上。你可以建立一个“个人高频错词本”，将如"committed", "infrastructure", "continuously"等词记录下来重点记忆。在写作后，请务必留出几分钟快速通读，专门检查拼写。这个习惯能帮助你的作文质量实现最后的突破，稳稳地迈入最高分的行列。

无论你是2026年考生还是备战2027考研英语，精读本文的2024年考研英语一批改范例都能为你的写作带来提升。启航教育的写作主讲与AI智能批改系统全天候待命，为你的考研英语一作文范文冲刺保驾护航。