作为考研英语备考的核心模块,2011年考研英语一大作文承载了大量学生的提分期待。本文带来的这篇批改例文,紧扣考研英语一写作冲刺常见话题,由启航教育资深英语教研团队逐句批改,详细标注语法、词汇与逻辑三大失分点,是考研英语写作提分的优质资料。
一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目
考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文
As shown in the cartoon,there"re two visitors rowing a boat on the lake enjoying themselves and littering during their travel.
Evidently,the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environment protection is an issue that requires more attention both in our personal lives and in society.
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways,but two of them are profoundly significant.First and foremost,tragically,although the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon,its root cause environment pollution is that some individuals,in their pursuit of economic interest,have disregarded the virtue of environmenal protection.What"s more,neglecting environmental protection is like a heavy chain that hinders our country"s progress,not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth,but also significantly affecting its national image.
How can we give an end to this phenomenon?It is suggested that we need a package deals,including enhancing supervision and issuing related laws.But would these measures be comprehensive enough?In reality,we also need to strengthen moral education.With the support of these measures,we can solve the problem at its core.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:root cause environment pollution
批改: 句式残缺,应为 “the root cause of environmental pollution”
原文:environmenal
批改:拼写错误 “environmental”
原文:give an end to
批改: 表述不地道,常用 “put an end to”
原文:a package deals
批改:应为 “a package of measures”(“package” 后接 “of”,“measures” 为复数,“deals” 侧重 “交易”,不贴合 “对策” 语境)
原文:As shown in the cartoon,there"re two visitors rowing a boat on the lake enjoying themselves and littering during their travel. Evidently,the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environment protection is an issue that requires more attention both in our personal lives and in society.
批改:描述图片内容,符合题目要求
原文:This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways,but two of them are profoundly significant.First and foremost,tragically,although the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon,its root cause environment pollution is that some individuals,in their pursuit of economic interest,have disregarded the virtue of environmenal protection.What"s more,neglecting environmental protection is like a heavy chain that hinders our country"s progress,not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth,but also significantly affecting its national image.
批改:使用了一些表示逻辑关系的连接词,条理清晰
原文:How can we give an end to this phenomenon?It is suggested that we need a package deals,including enhancing supervision and issuing related laws.But would these measures be comprehensive enough?In reality,we also need to strengthen moral education.With the support of these measures,we can solve the problem at its core
批改:结尾升华主题,符合结尾段的内容和结构
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:16
这篇围绕 “游客湖面划船乱扔垃圾” 的漫画分析文,具备完整框架,能精准提炼 “环境保护需重视” 的核心观点,态度鲜明。但存在语法拼写错误,加强固定搭配的背诵,写完整体检查一遍,避免出现细节上的问题。
读完本文,你对2011年考研英语一大作文的考研英语一写作冲刺写作思路是否有了更清晰的把握?启航教育为2027考研人整理的考研英语写作高分资料包,包含近年真题、高分模板、热点话题预测,在线咨询即可免费领取。
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