2011年考研英语一大作文属于典型的图表作文,要求考生准确描述数据变化并深入解读现象。本文精解的这篇柱状图批改范例,完整覆盖考研英语一作文范文常考图表的描述思路,是考研英语图表类作文的标杆范例。
一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目
考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文
As shown in the picture, there are two tourists, sitting on the boat, appreciating the beautiful scene and throwing trash into the river, which pollutes the river so much. Evidently the picture intends to convey to readers that environmentalpollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal lives and in society.
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, environmental is like a heavy chain that hinders our nation’s progress, not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth, but also significantly affecting its international image. What’s more, tragically, although the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon, its root cause lies in the fack that some individuals, in their pursuit of ecomomic interests or personal enjoyment, have disregarded the importance of environmental protection.
How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including issuing related regulations and enhance supervision. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to foster the quality of protecting environment deliberately. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:Evidently
批改:加逗号
原文:environmentalpollution
批改:两个单词之间记得加空格
原文:scene
批改:改为 scenery 更合适
原文:so much
批改:表达比较口语化,建议删去
批改:开头段表达不错,清晰地阐述了图画内容, 表达的主题和图画也是贴合的
批改:语法正确
原文:environmental
批改:此处要写完整,改为 environmental pollution
批改:语法正确
原文:fack
批改:fact
批改:内容表达很好,也很具体
原文:enhance
批改:including 是介词,后面要用动词的ing形式,改为 enhancing
批改:结尾段内容表达很好
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:16分/20分
题目要求:总体上来说是切题的,表明了个人观点,和图画的内容很贴合
语言表达:存在几处语法和拼写问题,词汇表达不错,一些句式也很好
结构逻辑:文章的结构完整清晰,内容也比较丰富具体
修改建议:1. 语法问题结合作文批注仔细修改 2.拼写要细心。之后可以多积累素材,自己多练练句子,进一步丰富自己的句式和观点储备,提高自己的语言表达,总的来说写的不错,加油!
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