本文将启航教育一对一批改过的2016年考研英语一高分范文进行公开呈现。批改老师对文中每一个失分细节进行了精确标注,对照考研英语写作模板热点话题与评分细则,你可以快速了解考研英语写作的提分方向。
一、考研英语一2016年大作文题目
考研英语一2016年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following pictures. In your essay, you should1) describe the pictures briefly, 2) interpret the meaning, and3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2016年大作文批改例文
In the left picture, we can see a father smoking and watching TV, while demanding his son to study hard. On the contrary, in the right picture, there are a son and a father studying together. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to us that setting a good example plays an important role both in our personal lives and in society.
The phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, the parents" examples play a crucial role in children"s growth. Thus, parents should demonstrate a positive and encouraging attitude. On the other hand, children are easily influenced by people around them, and lend to imitate their behaviors. So if parents set a good example, their children will learn from them and foster a good habit.
In brief, a good example acts as the catalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice. Only by doing so can we develop personal potential, create a happier life, and make the world shine with renewed brilliance.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:In the left picture, we can see a father smoking and watching TV, while demanding his son to study hard. On the contrary, in the right picture, there are a son and a father studying together. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to us that setting a good example plays an important role both in our personal lives and in society.
批改:总结全文,升华主题,展望未来,立意深远。
原文:The phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, the parents" examples play a crucial role in children"s growth. Thus, parents should demonstrate a positive and encouraging attitude. On the other hand, children are easily influenced by people around them, and lend to imitate their behaviors. So if parents set a good example, their children will learn from them and foster a good habit.
批改:以分论点的形式论述父母以身作则建立榜样的重要性,逻辑严谨,层次分明。。
原文:In brief, a good example acts as the catalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice. Only by doing so can we develop personal potential, create a happier life, and make the world shine with renewed brilliance.
批改:总结全文,升华主题,展望未来,立意深远。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:19/20
作文对漫画的理解到位,写作思路紧扣主题,有些短语句式的表达也不错,基本能够传达清楚作者的写作意图。
细节:考试时可以多积累高级词汇,写作文就能用上,但尤其注意单词拼写不要出现明显错误,特别是与主题词相关的单词要重点留意。
3.内容:两幅图呈现了两位父亲不同的教育方式,形成了鲜明对比:一个是自己做不到,却徒然口头要求孩子努力学习;另一个则以身作则,默默同孩子一起看书。两幅图的寓意是:父母对孩子的教育应当言传身教、以身作则。也可从以下几个方面展开:父母的表率作用;行动的重要性;父母要真正的关心孩子的教育,而不应只停留在口头上等等。
整体来看,作文理解了漫画内涵,段落框架明确,大体上与题目要求保持一致,后续继续注重练习,加油!
读懂范文只是第一步,写出高分作文才是关键。启航教育提供考研英语作文免费批改服务,由资深讲师逐句点评,让你清晰掌握考研英语写作模板写作锦囊的核心要点。2027考研英语备考,从一篇专业批改开始。
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