2011年考研英语二大作文真题与例文批改

启航教育考研英语教研组精心筛选了2011年考研英语二大作文真题原文及高分批改范例。本篇范文中，老师对每一句都给出修改建议，是考研英语二作文范文备考资料库中的精品，特别推荐给参加2027考研的学子。

一、2011年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2011年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart and 2) give your comments. You should write at least 150 words. Write your essay on ANSWER SHEET 2. (15 points)

二、2011年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The bar chart clearly depicts the market performance of certain brands in the car market of our country in 2008 and 2009. In 2008, the percentage of Chinese brands was approximately 25%, but by 2009, this rate had substantially risen to around 32%. In contrast, the percentage of Japanese brands experienced a significant decline of about 10% during the same period. Simultaneously, the percentage of American brands remained stable and steady.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes. our government has made tremendous efforts to drive economic growth and elevate the purchasing power of the populace, allowing them to afford automobiles that were previously deemed luxury items. In addition, Chinese society is undergoing an extensive and profound transformation. In my view, the fundamental reason for this phenomenon is the significant progress made by China"s manufacturing industry in responding to these changes. Con sidering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about the future trends? I am confident that the proportion of Chinese brands will steadily increase in the following decades. In contrast, the proportion of Japanese brands will likely continue to decrease.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：the market performance

批改：市场份额可以说 the market shares

原文：in the car market of our country

批改：国内汽车市场可以说 in the domestic automobile market

原文：The bar chart clearly depicts the market performance of certain brands in the car market of our country in 2008 and 2009.

批改：首段概括图表内容可以参考如下 “The bar chart clearly depicts the change of the market shares among Chinese, Japanese and American automobile brands from 2008 to 2009.”

原文：Chinese brands

批改：也可以说 Chinese automobile brand 或 domestic brand

原文：approximately

批改：为了更准确地描述图中数据及其变化，可以运用一些小词如 approximately/nearly/around 等帮助表述

原文：experienced a significant decline of

批改：多储备表变化的名词、动词、形容词、副词或词组在写作过程中会很有帮助，名词包括像 growth/reduction，动词像 increase/drop，副词和动词搭配如 slightly decrease，运用起来让人眼前一亮

原文：stable and steady

批改：stable和steady意思相近，删去其中一个

原文：The bar chart clearly depicts the market performance of certain brands in the car market of our country in 2008 and 2009. In 2008, the percentage of Chinese brands was approximately 25%, but by 2009, this rate had substantially risen to around 32%. In contrast, the percentage of Japanese brands experienced a significant decline of about 10% during the same period. Simultaneously, the percentage of American brands remained stable and steady.

批改：首段概括了图表内容，描述了图中各项数据和它们之间的变化关系，需要注意区分不同图表类型（柱状图/折线图/饼状图等）及应当如何描述；除此之外，灵活用词，转换词性，像decline就既可以作名词，又可以作动词，掌握一个词的不同用法有利于变换表达方式，这样文章语言也就不会那么受限了

批改：这里用逗号

原文：the populace

批改：可以有意识地替换表达，像 people/populace 就可以用 consumer 或 resident 等各种身份去指代

原文：deemed

批改：be deemed to be “被视为...”，也可以用 be regarded as

原文：manufacturing industry

批改：可以说 manufacturing / car manufacturing / automobile industry

原文：Con sidering

批改：正确写法为 Considering

原文：The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes. our government has made tremendous efforts to drive economic growth and elevate the purchasing power of the populace, allowing them to afford automobiles that were previously deemed luxury items. In addition, Chinese society is undergoing an extensive and profound transformation. In my view, the fundamental reason for this phenomenon is the significant progress made by China"s manufacturing industry in responding to these changes. Con sidering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

批改：分析产生这种趋势或现象的原因，给出的第一个原因是经济发展，人们的购买力提升，年轻人成为国产汽车的主要消费群体，第二个原因是制造业的蓬勃发展。除了本段论述的国家和社会层面，建议可以拓展更多主体，还可以从“国产汽车品牌自身优势”的角度入手，如 “Chinese automobile brand, preferred by the young, has been more competitive due to its advantageous price and technological advancement.”

原文：likely

批改：删去

原文：What about the future trends? I am confident that the proportion of Chinese brands will steadily increase in the following decades. In contrast, the proportion of Japanese brands will likely continue to decrease.

批改：结尾预测未来国产汽车品牌的市场份额将继续扩大，建议可以对作为市场主体的国产汽车制造商或汽车企业提出展望或“怎么做”的一些建议，如引进更多技术提升产品质量

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：8/15

1）内容上：概括了图表内容，数据及其变化描述较准确；

2）语言上：表达较为顺畅，用词和句型可以更丰富；

3）结构上：有自己的行文角度，内容可以更充实、更有逻辑；

4）学习建议：

有待提升的主要有三方面，一是语言上多积累表变化的动词、表程度的副词和描述最大最小值的一些短语，描述图表会更准确和形象；二是内容上可以从国家-社会-市场/企业-个人等主体展开，按“是什么（给观点）——为什么（析原因）——怎么做（结尾提措施/做法）”的逻辑展开，这样主干各要点更清晰明了；三针对现象-原因型文章，主要分析是什么原因导致该种趋势或现象的发生，写作过程中按各个主体的角度串联论述逻辑会让文章更有条理，如：由于经济发展，综合国力提升（国家）——一方面人们购买力提升（社会），另一方面国产品牌有着自身优势广受欢迎（市场/企业），从而使人们对国产品牌更有信心，尤其是年轻群体（个人偏好）——因此国产汽车品牌份额呈持续上升（总结）——未来将继续大力发展汽车制造业（展望+提措施），还可以结合时事热点和具体的例子进行阐述

考研英语二作文范文写作提分高效的方式，是让经验丰富的老师亲自批改你的作文。启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班，主讲斌哥亲批每一份学员作业，真题作业批改、轻松应对各种复杂题目，让考研英语写作更有底。